Teen Set Free from Floundering Faith   1

I saw a teenager who had been depressed for three years and was living with his mother and stepfather.. He described his mother as a good mother who was affectionate, outgoing and very active and who was very close to him. The mother was very concerned about her son and said that she believed in God and went to church but he admitted that he no longer shared her faith. He denied having any significant losses and was reluctant to admit to having any anger toward anyone. I asked permission to speak to the boy alone and his mother stepped out so that we could talk openly. 

Research says that 87% of all depression is caused by some type of loss but this young man reported no significant losses in his life. He told me that he became depressed at age 13 when his mother tried to commit suicide and he felt that he had to keep a constant eye on her. She became so depressed that she stayed in her room all the time and she didn't cook, do dishes, or do laundry and she was still very depressed and suicidal. As I listened to him it became clear that when this young man was 13 years old and his mother became depressed he lost the close relationship he had with her. This was a traumatic loss for him because he had been very close to his mother previously and she had been a vibrant, loving mother until she became so depressed. Even though she was still living he had lost the happy family and happy mother he had known previously. 

Having recognized that this was the loss that led to his depression I shared with him the story of another 17-year-old boy who was set free from his grief and loss through prayer. In spite of his faltering faith the young man immediately said he was willing to try this. We made a list of 16 things he missed about his mother since she became depressed such as her talkativeness, her outgoing personality, her willingness to play games with him, and her happiness and affectionate. We then prayed about these 16 losses and he gave them to the Lord and asked Him to take his grief from him. After the prayer I asked him how he felt and he said, "Not so alone; no resentment; I feel lighter (I felt heavy before); at peace." He also indicated that he no longer believed that it was his fault because he had not taken his mother's warnings seriously. He said, "She would have felt that way no matter what I did." Having experienced this dramatic change in feelings through prayer his faltering faith in God was stengthened. He told me that he was comfortable with this process and he was looking forward to returning. His posture was more energetic, he had good eye contact, and he was smiling as he left. Hopefully, this young man will see how good the Lord is and continue to strengthen his faith! 

Like this young man, many young people go to church all their lives and never see any real evidence that it makes a difference in anyone's life because they see so many defeated, unhappy Christians. But when they experience the power of God to set them free through prayer their faith is renewed. Pray with me that Christians everywhere will learn how to pray about their emotions and allow the Lord to give them His love, joy, and peace so that the world can see the reality of God in the lives of believers and know that the Lord is real and can make a difference in their lives!

The Woman Who Hated Christmas       2

A young woman lost her mother sixteen years earlier on Christmas day and for the last sixteen years she has hated Christmas because it stirred up deep feelings of grief and sadness. She agreed to meet with me, however, to learn how she could get rid of these feelings. She told me how she grew up in Thailand and how close she was to her mother, who was her best friend. When she moved to the U.S. her mother became ill so she bought an airline ticket to see her, but before she arrived her mother died. This woman was devastated at the loss of her mother and felt deeply saddened but her loss. For the next 16 years she avoided Christmas because it reminded her of her mother's death and made her deeply sad. I explained to this woman that there were two simple steps she needed to take to get rid of her grief and sadness. The first step was to be completely honest with God about her sadness and grief, by telling Him everything she missed about her mother. I made a list for her as she told me what she missed about her mother. The second step was to pray and tell the Lord everything that she missed about her mother, and then ask Him to take her sorrow and carry it for her. I led her in a prayer and she prayed in her own native language and cried as she poured out her prayer to the Lord. When we were finished I asked her how she felt and she said that she felt much better; she felt like a load was lifted from her as she prayed. Even when I asked her to try to think about her mother she could not stir up the painful feelings of grief she had felt a few minutes earlier. She thanked me for praying with her and said, "You know, I have been here16 years and no one has ever told me about this." I went to her office to check on her a week later and she was wearing a Santa hat. When I asked her how she was doing she just smiled and pointed at her hat. Then she said, "Guess what? I went out and bought a Christmas tree this week." She was looking forward to Christmas for the first time in sixteen years and she had a good Christmas with her husband and children. A month later I decided to check on her again and went to her office. She told me that she was doing well and she felt like she had her life back. Her husband told her that he was glad to have his wife back and she said, "He tried to take down our Christmas lights this week and I said, 'No, leave the lights up.'" She was still enjoying the Christmas lights a month after Christmas, now that she had released her grief and sadness over the loss of her mother." Grief (Stock Photo Used) 

Young Man Loses His Best Friend 3

A seventeen-year old boy was sent to a Boy's Home because he was homeless and was not attending school. Three weeks before he arrived he had lost his best friend, his cousin, with whom he was living so I met with him when he arrived to see how he was doing. He said that he was having a difficult time and he felt pain in his chest most of the time, from missing his cousin. I asked him if he would like to get rid of that pain if he could and he told me that he would do anything to get rid of it. I volunteered to show him how to do that. I explained to this young man that there were two simple steps he needed to take. First, he needed to be completely honest about his feelings by making a list of everything he missed about his cousin. We did this together; he talked about what he missed about his cousin and I made the list for him. Second, he needed to say a simple prayer in which he was honest about his feelings with God and then asked Him to take his grief and sadness and carry it for him. This young man did not come from a religious family; in fact, both of his parents were in jail, but he said that he believed in God and he believed in prayer. So, I led him in a simple prayer and he asked the Lord to carry his grief for him. When we finished praying I asked him how he felt. He said that he felt the grief had been lifted from him so I told him to think about his cousin and try to stir up the grief and sadness he had felt previously. He tried but was unable to do so. "I felt like a load was lifted from me when I prayed," he said. I ended our session and told him I would stay in touch with him. The next day I saw him outside mowing grass so I approached him and asked him how he was doing. He said, "You know, last night I slept all night long for the first time in three weeks!" "That's great!" I replied. "Have you been thinking about your cousin this morning while you have been mowing?" "I have," he said, "but I have just been remembering the good times we had together. The pain I had in my chest is gone. I feel good." I followed up on this young man for the next five months while he was at this Boy's Home and the grief and sadness never returned. He resolved it all during this one prayer session that had lasted about thirty minutes. The Lord took all his grief and sadness when we prayed and gave it to Him. 

Grief turned Off Woman Loses Her Husband  4

A woman came for counseling after being on antidepressants for seven months. Her husband died from cancer, leaving her with two young children whom she was home schooling. There was nothing abnormal about her reactions. She was sad, missed her husband, and often broke down in tears when she thought about him. She had a supportive family and a good church home but at times just missed her husband and wept about him. She asked for help in resolving her grief so that she could get off the antidepressant medications. Because of her strong spiritual beliefs I shared with her how she could get rid of her sadness and grief. I suggested that she write out a list of everything she misses about her husband and then to be honest with God about her feelings and ask Him to take her grief and carry it for her. She went home and did as suggested. She prayed and told the Lord what she missed about her husband and began crying, and then as she gave her feelings to Him she said that her crying stopped suddenly. She said “it was like a faucet being turned off” because her tears stopped suddenly and she began to feel peaceful and calm. When I saw her again she felt completely peaceful and calm and was no longer brought to tears when she thought about her husband. She still missed him but no longer felt such deep sadness. She began to wean herself off her medications. After several weeks more she was still calm and doing well, having no more episodes of sadness and crying. She agreed that it was a miracle of healing that the Lord had done in her life and now she was able to focus all her attention on raising her two children. It was indeed a miracle because secular approaches cannot speed up the recovery process like this after the loss of a loved one. But Jesus “heals the brokenhearted.” Praise God! 

Young Addict Set Free Teenage Girl Loses Her Uncle  5

It's sad to see a young person struggling with addiction before they are even grown. I saw a young teenage girl recently after she had almost overdosed on alcohol, cocaine, marijuana, and ecstasy. This young lady had been raised by her grandparents until they divorced and their divorce was very painful to her. She did not get along well with her mother and at age 13 she began cutting on herself due to the pain of her grandparents' divorce and the hurt she felt from her mother. She then lived with her grandmother, whom she loved, and her uncle became her father figure and spent a lot of time with her. Then a year ago her uncle died tragically and this led to painful feelings of loss which she began drowning with drugs and alcohol. I felt compassion for this young lady and for the pain she was carrying and I asked her if she would like to get rid of that pain if possible. She said she would so I told her about a 17 y.o. boy who got rid of his grief by giving it to the Lord in prayer. I asked her if she was interested in trying this and she was very eager to do so. She said that her grandmother taught her about the Lord and took her to church with her. I asked her what she missed about her uncle and she told me that he was funny, she enjoyed playing basketball with him, she missed seeing him every day and hearing his bad singing and guitar playing, she missed his teasing, his loud laughter, and his kindness to her. As she shared her memories of her uncle she cried and laughed at times. We made a list of fourteen things she missed about him then we prayed and gave it to the Lord and asked Him to take it from her. After the prayer I asked her how she felt. She smiled and said that she felt relieved and felt calm. She no longer felt the pain of her loss of her uncle. Even when I asked her to think about her uncle and everything she missed about him she said that she felt peaceful and calm. I encouraged to use the same prayer process to deal with the loss of her grandfather after the divorce and to deal with her anger toward her mother. As we parted she was still smiling and feeling good. It's sad to see such a young person abusing drugs but it is wonderful to have the opportunity to show such a young person how to be set free. Jesus healed another broken heart and set another captive free! Praise God! 

Morphine Addict Set Free Man Resolves Losses  6

A man came to me who had developed an addiction to morphine. As a young man he developed a serious medical condition that required him to have many surgeries over the next 10 years. He was finally fired from his job due to missing so much time for medical problems and became disabled and depressed due to his inability to provide for his family. He was placed on several pain killers to help him cope with his physical pain and then was eventually placed on morphine. However, he soon discovered that the morphine not only helped ease his physical pain but also helped reduce his depression and emotional pain and so he began to abuse it. When his wife discovered how he was abusing the morphine she took control of his medications. He felt ashamed of his behavior but he also felt a compulsive need and urge to use it, and this just increased his depression and feelings of worthlessness. When we met initially I reviewed his history and learned that he had a history of anger and several significant losses that were contributing greatly to his depression. I explained how he could improve his emotional feelings by resolving his anger and grief and I explained the two simple steps he needed to take: 1) Be completely honest about your feelings by making a list of everything you miss about the person, and 2) Give your grief to the Lord and ask Him to take it from you. I volunteered to pray with him but he said that he would rather do it on his own. The following week when I saw him he looked more cheerful and when I asked him how he was doing he said, "I'm doing a lot better today." He told me that he did as I suggested and prayed about the loss of his father, his grandmother, and his uncle. Initially he did not perceive any change but over the next several days he began to notice that he felt peaceful about these losses and no longer cried when thinking about them. He also noticed that he began sleeping better and quit waking up at night and he was no longer craving his medications! Previously, he told me , he was always looking forward to his next medication dosage but he had begun forgetting when it was time for his meds. His wife even noticed this change in his behavior. He was amazed at this sudden change in his feelings and in his cravings for the morphine. Although he still had a physical disability, physical pain, and was unemployed he no longer felt so depressed about it. He admitted that the prayers had made a significant difference in his life and given him much more peace. The exciting thing about this case to me was that he was able to do this on his own by just following the suggestions I had given him. I didn't even have to pray with him about it and he didn't have to read my book. I just love to see miracles like this! God is so good! He wants to do miracles in our lives and set the captives free. If people can do this on their own, then others can do it with them who have had very little training. and Christians all across the country so that the church will become known for the mighty things that God is doing in the lives of men and women who are in bondage. 

Young Man Loses His Father   7

I saw a 17-year-old boy with his mother who was very concerned about him because he had been using meth for several years and was facing possible incarceration. His family was so disappointed in him that many of them cut off communication with him. He was desperate for help but did not want to enter an inpatient treatment program because he had a child due in a few weeks and he wanted to be present when the child was born. I described to him the "faith-based" process that would eliminate his underlying emotional issues and he and his mother both gave their consent to using this approach. I then did a quick background review to identify problem emotions he had prior to his abuse of drugs. He had a good family upbringing until age 13 when his mother divorced his father because of an affair he had. This young man was very close to his father so he chose to live with his father, but his siblings chose to live with their mother. He became very lonely and depressed, however, so he went to live with his mother. Then he felt depressed about losing contact with his father who gradually withdrew and quit contacting the children. When I saw this young man a few days later he still looked very anxious, timid, and insecure, and made very little eye contact with me. I explained the two simple steps to him for resolving his feelings of grief for the loss of his father. First, he needed to be completely honest about his loss and state what he missed about his father. I helped him identify 13 things he missed about his father. Next, he needed to say a short prayer, telling the Lord what he missed about his father and asking Him to take his feelings of sadness and loss from him. I led him in a prayer and he gave his sadness and grief to the Lord. After praying I asked him how he felt. He said, "I feel happier." I asked him to think about his father and tell me how he felt and he began to straighten up in his chair, began smiling, and began making good eye contact. He said that he didn't feel any more sadness and that he still felt happy. The change in his countenance was so dramatic that he looked like a different person. He agreed to return in a week so that we could pray about several more losses and feelings that he needed to resolve. It is exciting to see how the Lord can heal emotions so quickly and make such a dramatic difference in a person's life. This young man was transformed from a timid, anxious, depressed young man to a confident, happy young man in just a few minutes. The Lord is able to heal us quickly from grief, anger, sadness, and shame and to set us free from additions and emotional bondage because He is the "Wonderful Counselor." He loves to heal the brokenhearted and set the captives free. 

Bipolar Woman Set Free  8

A woman who came to our meeting in the jail cried constantly and interrupted to talk about her mental problems since she lost her 5-month-old child who was born prematurely and then died when he was delivered. Since she lost her child 3 years ago she said that she had been medicated and had begun abusing drugs. She said she was bipolar and would have to be on medications the rest of her life, and she complained that there was no doctor in the jail to give her medications. The first week we tried to keep her from dominating the group discussion but the following week she continued to rant and weep about herself. We met with her privately after our meeting to pray with her and she cried continuously as she expressed feelings of sadness, grief, anger, and guilt. With some difficulty we made a list of what she missed about her child and the losses that occurred along with his death and then I led her in a prayer to give her feelings to the Lord and to ask Him to take them from her. Then I asked the Lord if there was anything that He wanted her to know. This woman immediately stopped crying and said, "I'm thankful God is taking care of him; I'll see him again." Then she spoke to the Lord and said, "I'm sorry for being angry at you." I asked her if she had any other thoughts and she said, "I'm thankful that He saved my life. He will not put more on me than I can bear." "How do you feel now?" I asked. "Well," she said, "I stopped crying!" We all laughed at the sudden change in her demeanor. She said that she felt hope and calm and then she said, "I picture him (the baby) in God's hands. He's okay. We're going to all be together as a family some day in heaven. He's okay. It's not my fault." "Does that feel true?" I asked her, and she affirmed that it did. The amazing thing was that as this young woman received healing of her grief the Lord brought these truths to her mind and they released her from her anger toward God, her husband, and her mother as well. We didn't need to pray with her about each of these issues. "I am happy" she said as she sat there calmly "in her right mind" without crying. It reminded me of the Gerasene demoniac who was ranting wildly one minute and then a short while later was sitting clothed with Jesus and "in his right mind." This young lady was smiling and was no longer crying or fixating on her lost son and her guilt. Another inmate who sat with her and observed as we prayed was astounded and said that she couldn't believe how dramatically this woman had changed and been set free. Three weeks later she continues to do well emotionally although we know that she has other issues for which she needs prayer. It was an awesome demonstration of the power of God to set captives free. 

Woman Set Free from Grief  9

We had a Set Free Conference yesterday and had a good turn-out and a wonderful response. One woman who attended it went to her car afterwards and left and then turned around and came back to ask for prayer. Three of our team members met with her to pray. She told us that her brother died exactly three months earlier and she began crying as she told us that he was her best friend. I asked her what her main emotion was when she thought about him and she said she just missed him. She said that she missed talking to him three or four times each week, she missed his laughter and joking, spending the holidays with him, his encouragement, his friendship, his love for her children, and being able to share childhood memories with him. We made a list of 16 things she missed about him and then one of our ministry team members led her in a prayer. She sobbed throughout the prayer as she told the Lord everything she missed about her brother. After giving her sadness and grief to the Lord and asking Him to carry it she began breathing more calmly and quit crying and in a few seconds she began smiling. She said, "I feel better, I feel relief. I could hardly breathe." She told us that she had been to a psychiatrist and had changed her medications several times but it didn't help but now, she said, "I feel light. It was such a heavy burden." She began crying again and I asked her what emotion she was feeling. She said that she was just so relieved and happy to have gotten rid of that burden. The next day she told us that she immediately drove to her brother's gravesite and was able to visit it without crying and with complete peace in her heart. She had heard at the conference how the Lord can take away her grief but she still had doubts that it would work, but Jesus used one of our prayer ministers with no psychological training to pray with her and do what the psychiatrist and his medications could not do; He healed her brokenheart. What a God we have! 

Suicide Trauma Survivor Set Free Set Free from Suicide Trauma  10

Our ministry team went to Kansas on November 3, 2012 to provide some training to a large group of Youth Ministers. After the first hour in which I gave an overview of the ministry principles I asked for a volunteer who would like to resolve some feelings of grief. A young woman came forward for prayer. She said that her brother committed suicide three years ago and she was the last one he called before taking his life. As she spoke the tears began to flow and the audience became silent and attentive. I explained that when there is a suicide the surviving friends and family members often have mixed fee lings of grief, sadness, anger, and shame and I asked what emotion she felt. She stated that she felt sadness and missed her brother. I asked the young woman what she missed about him and she began tearfully talking about how she missed his presence, watching him play with her children and being a good uncle to them, hearing his jokes and laughter, witnessing his friendliness to people, and seeing his big, brown eyes. She also missed hanging out with him, talking with him, and mothering him since he was much younger than her. After completing the list of losses I led her in a prayer and she told the Lord what she missed about her brother and asked the Lord to carry her pain for her, then I asked the Lord if there was anything that He wanted her to know. She said, "It's okay." She said she felt "calm and blank." She still looked a little tearful so I asked if she felt some sadness and she said that she did. She was sad because she was helpless to do anything to prevent his suicide, he was too young to die, her children lost their uncle, he wouldn't get to see her kids grow up, and she would never see him get married and have a family. We prayed about these feelings of sadness and she gave them to the Lord; then I asked the Lord again if there was anything that He wanted her to know. "There's nothing I could have done" was the response she received. She never stated that she felt any feelings of shame or that she should have been able to do something, but she apparently felt this way, and these thoughts removed that feeling. Now she said she felt "peace and calm." I asked if there were any other negative feelings and she admitted that she felt some anger at her parents and brother because her father was not a good father, her mother did nothing when warned about her brother's mental state, and her other brother was such a poor model to this brother who died and did nothing to help him when asked for help. We prayed and she gave her anger to the Lord. After this prayer she said that her anger was gone and now she felt complete peace and calm. Later that day she told the church Youth Minister that she and her husband drove to her brother's grave site. All that she said was, "God is amazing! Thank you!" Suicides can be devastating to the family and friends of the deceased and lead to depression, anger, and substance abuse. The Lord set this young woman free from her feelings of grief, sadness, shame and anger that resulted from her brother's suicide and now she can pray with her children and family to see them set free. We had an incredible time and everyone left encouraged and excited about Jesus! God IS amazing!

I Can Breathe Again!  11

I saw a Christian woman who suffered from depression for four years after the loss of her sister-in-law and her brother-in-law. She was placed on an antidepressant due to uncontrollable crying after these losses but she continued to deal with depression for the next three years. Her depression began when her sister-in-law diedin 2008, with whom she was very close. We talked about her relationship with her brother-in-law and made a list of the many things she missed about him and then prayed and gave her grief to the Lord. I challenged her to try to think about him during the week and see if she still felt some sadness. The following week I saw her again and she told me that she tried to stir up some of her sadness and grief the following week but said it was completely gone. She became tearful as she spoke about him but said that these were tears of joy because her husband was now praying also and finding relief from his feelings of grief and anger. Then we talked about her feelings regarding the loss of her sister-in-law which her husband had released. Although she had been present when we talked about the sister-in-law, she still had some feelings of grief and sadness that had not been resolved. She said that she missed laughing with her and have fun, having private, confidential talks with her, listening to music and singing with her as they drove around, and having her companionship and being with her. She also identified several things that made her sad about this loss. We prayed and told the Lord what she missed about her sister-in-law then she gave her grief and sadness to the Lord and asked Him to take it from her. I asked her how she felt and she said, "It's weird; I can breathe now. I couldn't breathe when we started talking and it feels like my chest was suddenly opened up so I can breathe!" She and her husband left smiling, enjoying God's peace and goodness, and enjoying a deeper unity in their relationship. What a miracle! 

Skeptic Astounded by healing Skeptic Astounded by Healing  12

A large, burly man came to me who was referred by the courts for anger management and domestic violence classes. I gathered background information from him and learned that he came from an abusive home where he was emotionally and physically abused by his father, mother, and brother and then he was bullied by his peers in grade school. Then at age 11 his favorite uncle died who loved him and spoiled him and at age 16 a close cousin died. As he grew larger and older his anger increased and he began to bully the bullies in middle school and high school. At age 19 his best friend died and this further traumatized him and led to more emotional pain and anger. He lost four other close relatives and friends and with each loss his rage increased. During the first session I did not have time to share with this man how he could be set free so when he returned the following week with his wife I began to share with him how he could find release from his anger and grief through prayer. I am always very cautious about sharing this and assure people that I am not trying to force anything religious on them and that if they are uncomfortable with it I will not mention it again. His wife immediately said she was comfortable with it but this man was not sure. He told me that he had been baptized at age 18 but when his best friend died at age 19 he turned away from God and he considered himself an agnostic now. I asked him if I could show him how to get rid of his anger or grief through prayer would he consi der that there might be a God and he immediately said, "Yes." We talked about his grief over the loss of his favorite uncle at age 11 and made a list of 12 things he missed about him. He didn't show much emotion while talking about his uncle so I asked him how he felt. He told me that he felt like crying. I then led him in a prayer and he told the Lord how he missed spending time with his uncle, being spoiled by him, laughing and having fun with him, playing cards with him, and just being with him. Then we prayed and asked the Lord to take those feelings of sadness and grief from him and I asked the Lord if there was anything he wanted him to know. He sat silently for a minute then said, "It'll be alright." I asked him if that felt true and he said it did. "How do you feel now?" I asked. "A big burden's been lifted. He wouldn't want me to be sad. I feel at peace about it now. I feel happy!" I instructed this man to think about his uncle and try to stir up any negative feelings and as he did so he said that he felt a little sad because he still misses him and misses his smile and laughter. I prayed with him again about these two things and asked the Lord to take his sadness from him. Afterwards, I asked him again how he felt and he said, "I don't feel any sadness; it’s gone." He was astounded and his wife said it was like "magic." I told them that I believed it was truly a miracle and this man, who was an acknowledged skeptic and agnostic a few minutes earlier agreed that it was a miracle. I asked him if he was comfortable with this prayer process and he told me adamantly that he was; he was eager to return for more healing. The following week when I met with him he told me that he had prayed about three more losses on his own and had been set free! What a privilege we have to use prayer to bring healing and hope to people like this. When you try everything the world has to offer and nothing helps and then the Lord sets you free you have to get excited about the Lord! You have to share it with other people! What a tool this is for emotional healing, evangelism, and discipleship to lead people to the Lord or to bring them closer to him through prayer! “What a privilege to carry everything to God in prayer.” 

Workshop Attendee Set Free  13

On November 3rd I conducted a training workshop in Hutchinson, Kansas for a group of Youth Ministers with about 50 people in attendance. Since many of them had already read my book I only spent an hour in presenting an overview of the basic prayer principles then I asked for a volunteer with whom I could pray regarding some unresolved grief. A young woman volunteered who stated that she had lost her brother three years earlier when he committed suicide. I prayed with her in front of the group and she was completely set free from her grief, anger, and sadness over this event as the group observed. Later in that day this young lady and her husband went to visit her brother's grave site and felt complete peace and calm. Her only comment to the Youth Director was "God is amazing! Thank you!" I continue to hear from the Youth Director who organized the event and he says that the young lady is still doing great. Through the rest of the workshop we discussed the prayer process, answered questions, and then talked about how to do a "Social History" of the person in order to develop a prayer plan. The Youth Director wrote the following week and said, "God is doing great things here. I've prayed with five people here this week and all of them have received emotional healing. Your conference and taking that history (social history) have improved my counseling times 100%. I've become simpler and give even less advice and God does more as we simply pray through stuff." My team members and I prayed with several people after the workshop for emotional healing. One woman who prayed with a team member and received some emotional healing wrote to me later and said the following: "I, too, am looking for people to pray with everyday. I'm seeing Jesus work in my life setting me free from jealousy, bitterness, fear and distrust toward my sisters and freeing me to befriend women in a new way. Also, I have prayed with two women about their grief and seen them leave with peace. I also prayed with a man who just lost everything and the word Jesus spoke to him was "keep going." Isn't it amazing and wonderful how people like this, with no psychological training, are able to effectively help people be set free from emotional bondage like this? The church shows the world no evidence of God's power in their lives but the Lord wants to use each one of us who has received some healing to set others free and to demonstrate His power and His love for people everywhere so that His kingdom will be furthered. 

Man Loses 21 year old Son Man Loses Son  14

A man was referred to me by a pastor who had gone through one of my training conferences. This man suddenly lost his 21-year-old son about a year and a half ago when he had a brain aneurism thirty minutes after going to bed. His son lived with him, was six feet eight inches tall, and weighed 280 pounds and was just a good kid. He called his father every day during his lunch hour and so they were very close. There were no apparent health problems and when he went to bed that evening his father had no idea that it would be his last evening with him. The death of his son was devastating to him. He quit going to church and was angry at God for taking his son's life while allowing so many undeserving people to live. When I met him we talked about the things he missed about his son. He missed spending time with him each day, watching TV with him, getting his phone calls each day, and many other things. After making a list of about 20 things he missed about his son I asked this man if he would be willing to pray and tell the Lord what he missed about his son. He told me that would be a problem because he was mad at God. I asked him what he was mad about and he told me that it wasn't fair that God would take his life because he was such a good kid and He allowed so many worthless young people live who were trouble makers. I asked him if he would like to get rid of his anger toward God and he said he would! So we prayed about his anger toward God and the man gave it to the Lord and it left immediately. Then we prayed about his grief and sadness at the loss of his son and gave it to the Lord also. He said that he felt better afterwards and was not so sad or angry anymore. Yesterday I called him and asked him how he was doing. He told me he was doing great. He felt good and he was no longer grieving over his son. The Lord has set him free from his grief and anger! What an amazing thing it is to see the Lord continually healing the brokenhearted. He is truly worthy of our praise! 

Set Free from Wrong Relationship  15

I often encounter Christians who have gotten into a relationship that they know is wrong but they do not have the strength to end. A Christian woman broke into tears as she told me about a relationship she had with a man whom she had known from childhood. This man was her closest friend, was very loving to her and made her feel special but he used drugs and she knew that she could never have a godly relationship with him. Over the years they had spent time together, had long telephone conversations, and shared their dreams and feelings together. But as he grew older his addiction increased and she felt a great loss as he became increasingly impaired. She knew that she needed to end their relationship but she felt such a strong attachment to him that she could not. She had tried to pray on her own but was not able to get rid of these strong feelings. I asked her if she would like to get rid of these feelings of grief and sadness and she said that she would. I explained that she first needed to be completely honest about what she missed about him. We identified 19 things she missed about him and then I told her that the second thing she needed to do was pray and tell the Lord what she missed about her friend, and then ask Him to take her grief from her. She prayed and asked the Lord to take her grief from her. After this prayer she said that she felt better and she felt less intense feelings of grief but she still felt some sadness. We talked about the reasons for her sadness and said that she was sad because of how he has wasted his life, how he continued to abuse drugs, how unhappy he was, and how they could never have a godly relationship together in spite of their closeness. Through many tears and with many kleenexes she told the Lord seven reasons for her sadness and then asked the Lord to take her sadness from her and carry it for her. After this second prayer she quit crying and said that she felt much better. She was able to smile and not feel the intense sadness and grief about her friend that she felt previously. From many previous experiences similar to this I know that she will do well and will no longer feel the intense attachment to this man. The Lord wants to set us free from our emotional pain and as He sets this woman free from her intense sadness and grief for this relationship she will no longer be stuck in this compulsive, sinful relationship. 

Seventeen Years of Grief Released   16

A man was referred to me who admitted that he had a drinking problem that was destroying his marriage of 13 years. He said that he grew up in a Christian family with parents who got along well, and he was never abused. He was saved at age 8 and never drank or used drugs or got into trouble as a young person; he even worked as a minister of music in a church. But when he was 21 years old his father died suddenly from a heart attack at 45 years of age. This loss was devastating to him and two days after his father's death he got drunk and began drinking regularly. The man said that he quit drinking for several years and got married, but at age 30 he began drinking again and his drinking led to a lot of arguments with his wife and they were on the verge of divorce. He came, desperately looking for help. I explained that there is always an underlying reason for alcohol or drug abuse and he admitted that his grief over the loss of his father was the underlying emotional reason for his drinking. Seventeen years after the loss of his father he still thought about him every day and felt overwhelming feelings of grief. I told him that there are two things that he needed to do to get rid of his grief; first, he needed to be completely honest about what he misses about his father and second, he needed to tell the Lord what he misses about his father and ask the Lord to take his grief from him. He talked about how he missed spending time with his dad, building things with him in his shop, fishing, hunting, and camping with him and going with him on trucking trips. He said that he missed his laughter, his smile, his praise and encouragement, and his love and affection. He missed going on family vacations, watching television with him and even the smell of his boots. We made a list of 29 things he missed about his father, then he prayed and told the Lord these things and asked the Lord to take his grief from him and carry it for him. After this prayer, I asked the Lord if there was anything that He would like this man to know. After a brief moment of quiet reflection he said, "I love you; walk with Me. I'm not going to leave you; trust in Me. I'll get you and your wife through this. I forgive you." I asked him how he felt when he thought about his father and he said he felt happy. He also said that he felt some sadness, which is a different emotion, and I asked him what made him feel sad. He felt sad that his father died so young, that he was not around to meet his wife and children, and that his mother was so devastated by his death. We made a list of seven reasons for his sadness and then gave it to the Lord. I prayed, again, and asked the Lord if there was anything that He wanted this man to know. "Have joy in your life; you'll see him again. Focus on Me, your Heavenly Father; you'll get to be with me one day. I'll be with you; you can count on Me. Nothing is impossible for me." These thoughts lifted his spirit and filled him with joy and peace. I asked him how he felt and he said, "A burden was lifted. I feel happy. There's no more grief or sadness. I feel good." In less than an hour, 17 years of grief and sadness were lifted and replaced with peace. With those feelings resolved this man is going to do well. I've seen it hundreds of times that when people release the underlying emotional issues they carry, their drinking stops and their marriage heals. It is so exciting to see the goodness of the Lord and the power of prayer to set captives free! 

Woman Releases 30 Years of Grief   17

At a recent seminar in Arkansas I prayed with a woman who volunteered for prayer to get rid of her grief. She was a mature Christian woman who admitted that she had been depressed for many years and she said that she would like to get rid of it, even if it had to be done in front of a group of her church friends. It began when she was 14 years old and her grandfather died; she was never very close to her father. She said that her grandfather was fun-loving, cut up a lot and made her laugh. He was loving and affectionate, hard-working, caring, and he made her feel special. She said that she missed his praise and encouragement, going to church with him, feeling his arm around her, sharing meals with her, hearing him sing, and feeling safe and protected by him. As she talked she teared up and cried at the memory of her grandfather from over 30 years ago. We made a list of 25 things she missed about her grandfather and then I led her in a prayer and she told the Lord what she missed about her grandfather, then she asked Him to take her grief and carry it for her. After this prayer I prayed again and asked the Lord what He wanted her to know. She said, "He's laughing and smiling; he's very happy. If he was here he'd say, "Baby, you've got to let it go."" I asked her how she felt about the loss of her grandfather and she said, "I feel good." Her crying had stopped but she said she felt some sadness because she never had such closeness to her own father, her grandfather never met her children, and because he died so young, right after he had retired. We prayed about this sadness and she gave it to the Lord then I prayed again and asked the Lord if there was anything that He wanted her to know. She said, "I think my dad and papa are in heaven together and are smiling and happy for me." I asked this woman, again, how she felt. She began smiling and said, "I feel good." She said that her grief and sadness were all gone and she felt peaceful and calm. She went from tearfulness and being too choked up to talk, to smiling in a matter of minutes! It's amazing to see how consistently the Lord responds and takes away the grief and sadness of people when they are simply honest and give their grief to Him! What an amazing God we have! 

Medication and Grief Recovery Fail  18

I saw a woman who told me she was "miserable" with depression even though she had been on antidepressants for about 20 years. She had been depressed since her childhood when she was molested twice, she was afraid of her mother who was abusive to her, and she lost a brother when she was 17 years old. When I asked her what was her most painful loss or trauma she told me it was the loss of her father 20 years earlier, because he was loving to her and tried to protect her from her abusive mother. I explained how she could get rid of her grief through prayer and she stated that she would like to try it because she had gone to 12 weeks of Grief Recovery and it failed to give her relief from her grief. She missed his teasing, his laughter, his calmness and comfort, his love and affection, talking to him, playing ball with him, and riding around in their car with him. She said she also missed his compliments and praise, telling her how smart she was, and proudly telling people he met in stores "See my little girl!" We made a list of 27 things she missed about her father and tears came to her eyes as she shared her fond memories of him. Then I led her in a prayer in which she told the Lord everything she missed about her father and asked Him to take her grief and sadness from her. After she finished this prayer I asked the Lord if there was anything that He wanted her to know, and I told her to listen quietly and tell me if any thoughts came to her mind. "I am loved and very special; I can walk with my head up" she said. I asked her if those thoughts felt true and she said that they did. Then I asked her to think about her father and tell me how she felt. She said, "I feel at peace; I kind of feel happy" (she laughed). "Do you have any other emotions right now" I asked. "Happiness, peace, love, and joy," she said. I pointed out to her that the Bible called these the "fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, and peace." She was smiling and said she had no more sadness while thinking about her father. The grief and sadness she had carried for 20 years was suddenly and completely gone! I asked her what she thought about this prayer process and she said, "That's amazing!" As I walked her out the door she laughed and said, "That really feels good!" What an amazing God we have who does heal the brokenhearted and set the captives free! He wants each of us to experience His love, joy, and peace and not to be depressed, sad, angry or anxious. Please learn how to pray like this every day and help me pass this on to others so that God will be glorified and people will be drawn to our churches to meet this Wonderful Counselor and Prince of Peace! 

Inmate Saved but not Set Free   19

I spoke to a group of inmates in the local county jail about how to be set free from anger and grief. I asked one of the young men if he had any grief or loss and he said that he lost his father three years ago, and his eyes reddened and he became tearful. I asked him if you would like to get rid of his pain and sadness about his father and he said he would; he was even willing to allow three other inmates to observe our prayer session so they could learn how to do this. I explained that there were two steps to resolving his grief. First, he needed to be honest about his loss and make a list of what he missed about his father and, second, he needed to pray and aske the Lord to carry his grief and sadness for him. He said that he got saved at age 13 but then his father got sick and he prayed and asked the Lord to keep him alive until he was 18 years old. He took care of his father for five years but he carried a lot of sadness during those years. His father did live until this young man was 18 years old, but on New Year's Eve when his father asked him to sit with him for the evening, he went out with some friends and smoked some weed. While he was out with his friends his father died on New Year's Eve and this led him to abuse drugs badly which led him to be locked up in jail. He told me that his father was his best friend and he missed talking with him, taking care of him, and watching TV and movies with him. He also missed his jokes, his sense of humor, his smile, his praise and encouragement, and his love and affection. He said he even missed his cooking and hearing him call him his "candy man." We made a list of 15 things he missed about his father and then we prayed and asked the Lord to take his grief and sadness and carry it for him. As he prayed he shed tears and his friends gave his kleenexes and patted him on the back to encourage him. When he finished his prayer I asked the Lord if there was anything that He wanted this young man to know. He said, "My dad loves me and wouldn't want me to be crying for him; he's in a better place. I can't go to him for advice but God is there for me. They both love me." I asked him how he felt and he said, "Happier. My heart doesn't hurt anymore. I feel a sense of peace." He told me that he regretted that he did not spend more time with him and he felt bad and shameful for not being with him when he died. I prayed about his feelings of shame and asked the Lord what he wanted this young man to know about his belief that he was bad and shameful. He said, "He knows how much I loved him. We all do things we regret, but we learn from it." I asked him, again, how he felt and he said "My heart doesn't hurt now." His feelings of grief and shame were both gone and he sat there smiling. We talked about what a miracle it is to see the Lord lift these feelings so quickly and how the Lord wants us to learn to cast all our cares upon Him and let him carry our emotional burdens for us. This young man was saved at age 13 but he had feelings of sadness that led him to abuse drugs; now he is set free from these negative emotions so that he can enjoy God's peace and joy and follow the Lord. There are many men and women in jail who were saved at a young age, but they were never set free. We are sharing with them how they can be set free so they will quit getting into trouble and begin following the Lord. 

Set Free from Divorce and 38 Years of Grief   20

I prayed with a man about the loss of his wife through divorce, and the loss of a very close friend. He first talked about his wife and what he missed about her. He said that he missed being with her, talking with her, fishing with her, raising their kids together, and spending the holidays together. He missed her “golden smile”, her big brown eyes and beautiful hair, and her love and affection. He identified 15 things he missed about her, then he prayed and asked the Lord to take his grief and sadness from him. After this prayer I asked him how he felt and he said, “I feel happy and thankful to have had her in my life.” He also said that he felt calm. We then talked about a close friend of his who died over 30 years earlier, and we made a list of twelve things he missed about this friend. He prayed and told the Lord what he missed about him, then asked the Lord to take his grief from him and carry it for him. When I asked him how he felt, afterwards, he said he felt “happiness” and had no more grief or sadness. He even chuckled at the memory of the funny laughter of his friend. A week later I saw this man again and asked him how he felt now about the loss of his ex-wife and his friend. He said, “That’s pretty amazing! Normally I spent my whole day just thinking about her but now I don’t. I feel okay.” He said that when he previously talked about his other friend he became very tearful and he could barely talk about him, but he said, “Now, I’m not choked up from talking about him!” This man was amazed at how quickly he was able to resolve his grief and how it changed his life so that he was no longer so emotional about these losses. I tried for 25 years to help people overcome their grief and I am still amazed at the power of God to set us free from our grief. “Surely He HAS borne our grief!” 

Inmate Releases Grief and Finds Hope  21

I saw an inmate in the local county jail this week who was in his 40s and who had many tattoos to testify to having lived a rough life. I asked him if he had struggled with drug abuse and he said that he had, and he had gone through many drug treatment programs and been involved in Alcoholics Anonymous and Narcotics Anonymous but was still struggling with his addiction. I shared with him the booklet, "How to Overcome Addiction" and explained that addicts use drugs to make them feel better because of the underlying feelings of grief, anger, and shame that they carry. He agreed that these were the reasons he had used drugs. I also shared with him that it is possible to find healing for feelings of grief, anger and shame and that when addicts are healed of these feelings they lose their urges to use drugs. He said that this made sense to him, so I asked him if he had lost anyone who was very close to him. He told me that he lost his mother fifteen years ago and that he still misses her, and when I asked him if he would like to get rid of his grief he said that he would. I explained that there were two things he needed to do: First, he needed to be completely honest about his grief and make a list of everything that he misses about his mother, and then he needed to say a simple prayer, telling the Lord what he misses about her and asking Him to take his grief and sadness from him. He told me that he misses her being available to make everything better, he missed her touch and her love and affection, he missed his talks with her, spending time with her after school, going for drives, and watching TV with her. He also said that he missed her cooking, her dry sense of humor, and receiving letters from her in prison. As he talked about his mother he was very tearful and emotional. We made a list of sixteen things he missed about his mother and then we prayed and asked the Lord to take all his sadness and grief from him. After the prayer I asked this inmate to think about his mother and tell me how he felt. He thought about her and said he felt "comforted and calm." He tried to stir up his sadness but was surprised to see that all his sadness and grief was gone. His tears were all gone and a smile broke over his face; it was clear from the look in his face that he had a new sense of hope, that the Lord could set him free from his addiction as he continues to cast all his cares upon HIm and allows Him to give him peace. What a joy it is to see inmates set free from their emotional bondage and begin to have hope again of a new life in Jesus. We are praying that the Lord will provide us a place where these inmates can go after they leave jail so they can continue to meet with us for prayer and be set free completely from their addictions and learn how to walk with the Lord day by day. Pray with us that this will happen and that the Lord will provide a place for us to help these men we see in the jail to transition out and be trained in how to pray for freedom, so that God will be glorified. 

Set Free from Grief in 10 Minutes  22

I saw a young man who wanted help with some relationship problems. He was in his early 20s and had never been married, but had four children by four different women. All of his problems began after age 19 when his father died, and he began drinking and getting involved in illicit relationships. Since his father's death was the obvious turning point in his life, I asked him how he felt when he thought about his father. He told me that he was at peace and had resolved it, but this was unlikely, so I asked him how he resolved his grief. He smiled and said he prayed with me a year and a half earlier at a church activity. Then I remembered him and I realized that I had only spent about 15 minutes praying with him and yet a year and a half later he still felt he had resolved this loss and felt peaceful about the loss of his father! What an amazing testimony to the power of prayer! He admitted that he still had some anger toward several of the women he had dated so we prayed about them and he was able to release his anger. Afterwards he said that he no longer felt any anger toward either of them and he still cared about them and hoped they were doing well. When people are full of anger and grief they are very vulnerable to using drugs or alcohol to feel better, and to getting involved in unhealthy relationships to feel better. This is what Paul said in Eph. 4:26-27, "Don't let the sun go down on your anger, and don't give the devil an opportunity." When we have unresolved feelings such as anger or grief we feel badly and the devil tempts us to do things to feel better. As this young man receives healing from all his anger and grief and shame he will be able to avoid unhealthy relationships and drugs and serve the Lord. 

Mother Releases Grief after Children Leave  23

A woman told me that she was depressed after Christmas because her grown children left to go back home. She lives alone and she enjoyed seeing her children and grandchildren over Christmas and watching them interact with one another. She missed hearing their laughter, hugging them, seeing what a good husband and father her son is, and seeing how successful and out-going her daughter is. She also said she enjoyed cooking for them, feeling needed, and just being able to love and enjoy them. When they left, she was alone again and felt depressed. I made a list of thirteen things she missed about her children and then she prayed and told the Lord these 13 items and asked Him to take her grief and sadness from her. I asked the Lord if there was anything He wanted her to know. She said, "He just took it! I feel okay!" She laughed at how quickly her sadness left her and I asked her if she had any other emotions. She answered, "I just feel more peace and joy. I'm hapy for the time we spent together. I feel at peace!" She left my office laughing at God's goodness and feeling no more depression or sadness. What a joy it is to see God's goodness and healing power to set His people free and give them His perfect peace! 

Set Free From Depression in One Session   24

I saw a woman who had been depressed since childhood as a result of numerous losses in her life. She was a Christian woman and had refused to take any psychiatric medications; she said she just stayed busy doing ministry and outreach activities. When I suggested that she could resolve her grief and overcome her depression she was surprised but very receptive to trying it. I explained that she needed to do two things: be completely honest about her loss by listing everything she missed about the person she lost, and then give her grief to the Lord in prayer and ask Him to take her grief from her. She said that her greatest loss was the loss of her mother five years earlier, so we made a list of everything she missed about her mother and gave her grief to the Lord in prayer, asking Him to carry it for her. She was shocked afterwards at how her grief suddenly lifted. When I saw her two weeks later I asked her how she was doing and she said, "It has really helped. Sometimes I would see someone in a store with white hair like my mother's and it hurt my heart, but I saw someone with white hair this week and I smiled. I just had good memories." She said that she spoke with two of her sisters and gave them a copy of my booklet on "How to Overcome Grief" and they both wrote down their losses and gave them to the Lord, and both of them felt better. She also said, "Most Tuesdays I was in a black mood due to my mother's death on a Tuesday. Now, I feel good on Tuesdays and have begun to do some visitation." I asked her to rate her depression on a 10-point scale and she rated it as a 0. She feels no more depression after giving her grief to the Lord, even though she has been depressed all her life! She told me that she wants to share this with her brother who is a minister, and she asked me for more copies of the Grief booklets. Isn't it wonderful how the Lord sets us free in such a simple way? Wouldn't it be wonderful if every pastor and minister would teach this from their pulpit to spread the word about how the Lord can heal the brokenhearted and set captives free? 

Skeptical Wife Set Free From Grief   25

A very distraught woman came for help after her husband of six years left her for another woman. They had separated and were trying to resolve their marital problems but then he met another woman and told his wife that their relationship was over. She was so distraught that it disrupted her sleep and she began having anxiety attacks. I explained how she could release grief through prayer and she told me that her father had been a preacher when she was a child and she said she was willing to try it, but she openly admitted that she was skeptical that it would work. We made a list of 29 things she missed about her husband, including his presence, his caring, his phone calls, and his talks with her when she was upset. She also missed watching certain TV shows together, going out on a date night each week, and his kisses in the morning and telling her that he loved her. As she talked about what she missed about him it brought tears to her eyes, and when we prayed through this list she cried even more. Then she told the Lord she was tired of carrying this grief and she asked Him to take it from her and carry it for her. After her prayer I asked the Lord if there was anything He wanted her to know. "You're Ok," was what came to her mind. She said she felt better but still had some sadness that her husband was moving on without her, so we prayed about this and she gave her sadness to the Lord. Again, I asked the Lord what He wanted her to know and she began smiling. She said she heard the words, "I have a plan." She said that this gave her some hope and this is what her deceased mother used to tell her all the time. When I asked her how she felt she said she felt no grief or sadness but she felt lighter and she felt hope. She was very skeptical that the prayer process would work but was amazed afterwards at how much better she felt. She said with a big smile, "I feel a lot better than I have in a long time!" She had entered the room with a heavy heart and heavy grief, but she left the room with a light heart and a smile on her face. The Lord does heal broken hearts! 

Teenager Set Free from Grief and Depression   26

I saw a young man who had been depressed for two months, since his best friend died from an accidental shooting. He stated that he had been depressed, had difficulty sleeping and concentrating at school, he thought about his friend all the time, he got upset easily and threw temper tantrums, and his grades had been dropping. I shared with him how he could release his grief by being completely honest about his grief and writing out a list of what he missed about his friend, then giving his grief to the Lord in prayer and he said that he was willing to try it. He talked about his friend and told me about all the good times he had with him, how he enjoyed spending time with him outdoors, fishing, talking, riding bikes together, and he missed his jokes, his sense of humor, and his friendship. He identified 23 things he missed about his friend and then I led him in a prayer and he gave his grief and sadness to the Lord and asked Him to carry it for him. When we finished praying I asked him how he felt and he said, "I feel a lot better. I was really feeling sad." "What do you think about that?" I asked. This young man said with a big smile, "God is amazing!" The following week I saw him again and he was smiling and looked happier. I asked him how his depression was and he said, "I don't feel any depression. I still think about my friend but I have no more pain or sadness." It's amazing how quickly the Lord heals the brokenhearted and sets people free from depression, because the world has no solution for depression. Just this morning I received a text from someone who just wrote a new book on depression. In his e-mail he wrote, "Despite an explosion of scientific research on depression...the number of depressed people is only growing.... Why are we losing the fight against depression?" He goes on to say, "Rejecting the conventional ideal that depression stems from defects in the mind or brain, I show instead that sadness and depression have deep roots in our development as a species, which illuminates why mood disorders can be so tenacious." I am thankful to see the Lord setting people free from grief and depression quickly and to reaffirm that Jesus can do for you and me what no doctor, counselor, psychologist, psychiatrist, or medication can do. He can heal your broken heart and give you true peace! 

Woman Set Free from Hopelessness and Despair    27

A woman came to me who had been unemployed for several years due to an injury, and she was experiencing a number of significant health issues. She said that she was crying a lot and shaking and she was "tired of being sick and not working" and she said that she felt hopeless and wanted to know when all of this would end. Her circumstances were certainly difficult but her degree of despair was so intense that I knew that she must have experienced such feelings previously, so I asked her if she had ever felt this way before. She said that she felt similarly 14 years earlier when her father died suddenly from a car wreck. I asked this woman how she felt now while talking about her father, and she said that she felt sadness, grief, and anger. I had previously shared with her how to release negative feelings through prayer so I asked her if she would like to get rid of those feelings and she said that she would. We talked about her father and she told me that she felt sad that he didn't get to see her children grow up, her kids never got to know their grandfather, she never got to be as close to him as she desired, and he died so suddenly that she never got to say goodbye to him. He also told me how much she missed seeing her father, hearing his voice, feeling special to him, listening to him crackinig jokes, and laughing at him. She said she missed his smile, receiving his phone calls, hearing him tell her that he loved her, and receiving his hugs. We made a list of 20 things she missed about him and things that made her sad, then we prayed and she asked the Lord to take her sadness and grief from her. I prayed and asked the Lord what He wanted her to know and she said, "Things will be better" and "I have most of him in my daughter." She explained that she had never thought about this but her daughter was a lot like her father, with the same smile, teeth, mannerisms, and sense of humor. I asked her how she felt now as she thought about her father and she said, "I feel better; I feel kind of happy." She told me that she felt no more sadness, grief, or anger. Even the hopelessness she had felt earlier was gone, even though she still had the same difficult circumstances and health problems, because we went to the source of her feelings and prayed about her grief and sadness over losing her father. The Lord replaced her sadness, grief, anger, and hopelessness with hope, peace, and joy. This is remarkable but shouldn't surprise us because the Bible says that we have a "God of Hope" (Rom. 15:13) and the "Lord of Peace" (2 Thess. 3:16) and the "God of all comfort" (2 Cor. 1:3). Don't let your circumstances rob you of hope, joy, or peace for long. Cast your burdens upon Him and listen to His words of truth when you are distressed and He will set you free. 

Girls Set Free from Grief over Loss    28

Two girls were sent to me after their great grandmother died recently. I had prayed with them previously so they understood the process and were comfortable with prayer, but their great grandmother died and they were sad. They both admitted that they were sad and missed her; the youngest began crying as we talked about their grandmother. They told me that they missed her laughter, her smile, her long hair, her perfume, and her hugs. They talked about how nice she was to them and how much they enjoyed going to her house, playing under her trees, and going to the creek with her to go fishing and swimming. The youngest girl told me how she missed sitting in her lap. We made a list of 17 things they missed about their grandmother and then we prayed and told the Lord these things. The youngest girl began crying again as we began praying and could barely speak the words, but she bravely repeated the prayer and asked the Lord to take her grief and sadness from her. When we finished praying I asked them how they felt. They both smiled and said, "I feel happy now, because she's in a better place." They showed no more signs of sadness and smiled as they walked out the door. It's sad to see young children depressed over the loss of a close relative but it is wonderful to see that even children can learn to pray like this, and learn to cast their cares upon Him at a very young age. Life has been difficult for these two little girls but the Lord has been good and He is teaching them how to come to Him for comfort. Adults often complain that this is too simple but even children can pray like this and find rest for their souls. Jesus said, "Suffer the little children to come unto Me, for of such is the kingdom of Heaven" and "unless you become as little children, you cannot enter the kingdom of Heaven." May God make us all like little children who are willing to come to Him for rest and comfort. 

That's Crazy Good! "That's Crazy!"   29

It's always interesting to go into the county jail to minister because there are so many hurting people there that want help. This week I went with a woman from my church into the women's unit and took the book cart full of Christian books. One young lady who was a new admit took a book and asked me about it. I saw the opportunity to strike up a conversation and asked her how long she had been in jail. She told me that she had been there five days and would be leaving the next day to enter drug court. I asked her if she understood why so many people who go to treatment programs resume their addiction once they leave, and she didn't. I explained that their underlying feelings of grief, anger, and shame are not resolved so they continue to feel badly and want to use drugs to feel better. She agreed that this is why she used drugs. I asked this young lady when she began using drugs heavily and she said it was at age 16, after her sister had died. I told her that I could show her how to get rid of her grief and sadness about her sister if she was interested. She said that she was interested so we sat down at a table and I explained that there were two things that she needed to do to get rid of her grief and sadness. First, she needed to be completely honest about her grief and tell me everything she missed about her sister. She became very tearful and told me how much she missed her sister's smile, her joyfulness, and her laughter. She loved people and others loved her; she missed her eyes, her touch, her love and affection, and talking with her. As we talked I made a list of sixteen things that she missed about her sister. Then I told her that the second thing she needed to do was to pray and tell the Lord what she missed about her sister and ask Him to take her grief and sadness from her. She said that she was willing to do this so I led her in a prayer in which she told the Lord everything that she missed about her sister and she asked Him to take her grief from her and carry it for her. I prayed and asked the Lord if there was anything that he wanted her to know. "She's okay," she replied, and "I can overcome this." I asked her to think about her sister and tell me how she feels. She said, "I can't cry anymore. It makes me smile." "What do you think about that?" I asked. "That's crazy!" she exclaimed. "That's crazy! It's really crazy, but good!" This woman had been carrying these feelings of grief and sadness over the loss of her sister nine years earlier, which had led her to abuse drugs in order to numb her feelings. Now, in a few minutes, she was completely set free from this emotional bondage. She asked me a question, but I couldn't hear her over the cellhouse noise, so she tried again and I still couldn't hear her. I leaned forward and she asked me a third time, "Can I give you a hug?" I smiled at her and said, "Yes." She was so thrilled to be set free from her grief that she felt compelled to give me a hug. When people are set free from emotional bondage like this young woman, they get excited about the Lord! It really is crazy and wonderful how the Lord sets captives free when they are honest and give their grief to Him and let Him carry it for them. 

Eighteen Years of Grief and Sadness Released    30

A woman told me that she had been depressed since age 11 when her mother died. Even after 18 years she still felt very sad and tearful when she thought about her mother and she said that she would like to resolve her grief and release it. I explained that there were two steps for releasing grief and the first step was to be completely honest about her feelings of grief and to make a list of everything she missed about her mother. She talked about what a wonderful mother she was and said she never raised her voice. Her mother was very loving and affectionate, she taught her how to cook, she snuggled with her when she was sick, she took naps with her, and she often praised her and encouraged this woman. The lady said that she missed hearing her play the piano, going to church with her, going on vacation with her, and getting up with her eary in the morning to fix her hair. She also missed seeing her smile and her pretty, blue eyes. This woman became tearful as she began recalling her mother's last days before she died from cancer. It made her sad to see her mother suffer and to be unable to see her mother very often because she was moved to a hospital a long distance from home. When she last saw her mother, she was unable to talk but she just smiled at her and held her hand. When her mother died, this woman was angry at God and angry at her mother for leaving her. It led to a lot of depression which still affected her. After making a list of 27 things that she missed about her mother and identifying six reasons for her sadness, we prayed through each of these items and she gave her grief and sadness to the Lord. I then prayed and asked the Lord if there was anything that he wanted this woman to know. She said, "My mom loves me. I am happy that I got to have her as long as I did." She also remembered sitting with her mother and watching the sun set, and this made her feel very calm and happy. I asked her how she felt and she said, "Happy and calm." She said that she had no more anger toward her mother or God. Eighteen years of grief and depression were lifted from her in about 20 minutes and she was smiling and feeling peace. The Lord wants us to experience His peace. It is normal to feel grief and sadness when we lose someone we love, but He does not want us to be stuck there for 18 years. If you will be completely honest with Him about your feelings of grief and sadness and give them to Him in prayer, He will lift your burden and give you His perfect peace, too. 

Tired of Hurting    31

A man came for help with his grief over losing his wife. They had been married for 33 years and had a good marriage and never fought, his wife was always cheerful and encouraging to him, and they enjoyed studying the Bible together and singing. At about age 40 she was diagnosed with cancer and began treatments which extended her life for nine years but destroyed her body and mind. She went from a beautiful woman to a weak, shriveled woman who could not take care of her basic needs and this man had to quit his job to take care of her in her last several months. She lost her mental abilities, also, and did not even know who he was most of the time. She died a slow, painful death three months ago and he became very depressed, cried all the time, and became so angry at times that he wanted to tear things up. He said that he could only sleep about two hours per night and he even developed doubts about God. I shared with this man how the Lord can set him free through prayer and he said he was willing to try it because he said, "I'm tired of hurting." We made a list of things he missed about his wife. He missed her positive personality, her smile and laughter, her cooking, her touches, her love and affection, and her smell. He told me how he missed going for long walks with her, playing the guitar for her and singing with her, praying together, and joking with her. He missed raising their children with her, and he missed being with her and seeing her hair, her eyes, and her beautiful smile. We made a list of 25 things he missed about his wife, then we prayed and told the Lord these things and asked Him to take his grief from him and carry it for him. When we were finished, I asked the Lord if there was anything that he wanted her to know. He said, "She's with Him now and He's taking care of her. She's alright and she's waiting for me." Then I asked him to think about her and tell me how he felt. He said, "I do feel relief. I feel nothing." I asked him what he thought about that and he said, "It's amazing! I prayed so many times over this but never felt any better! Now I feel calm." This man was experiencing "normal grief" and had already prayed on his own but did not know how to pray for relief. With a little help he is now experience God's peace again. The Lord does not want us to be stuck in our grief; He wants us to learn to be completely honest with Him and give our burdens to Him so that He can carry them for us. What an awesome God we have! 

Eighteen Years of Depression Released   32   

A woman told me that she had been depressed for eighteen years, since her mother had died. She was just a child at the time but she remembered how her mother used to play the piano and there was one particular song that she really enjoyed. She said that her mother was a wonderful mother, she never raised her voice, and she was very loving and affectionate. This woman missed seeing her mother's pretty blue eyes, her crooked smile, going to church with her, and hearing her pray. She also missed looking for rocks and chrystals with her, snuggling with her when she was sick, taking naps with her, helping her cook, and getting up early in the morning so her mother could fix her hair. We made a list of 27 things that she missed about her mother, then we prayed and she gave her grief to the Lord. She also had some sadness and as she began talking about her mother's last days she became very tearful. She told me that her mother had cancer and she suffered but she never show her children that she was in pain. When her mother had to be moved to a hospital far away from home it was sad that she got to see her mother only once per month. The last time she saw her mother, her mother could not talk but she smiled at her and held her hand. When her mother died she was angry at her for leaving them and angry at God for letting her die. We identified six reasons for her sadness and she gave her sadness to the Lord and asked Him to take it from her. Then I prayed and asked the Lord what He wanted her to know. "My mom loves me," she said. The word "sunset" came to her mind and she began remembering how she used to sit with her mother and watch the sunsets, and this brought tears of joy to her eyes. I asked her how she felt and she said, "Happy. I'm happy that I got to have her as long as I did. I miss her but I have no anger toward her or God." After carrying these feelings of grief and sadness for 18 years she was suddenly free! She said she felt "happy and calm" and she left the room with a smile on her face. After this session she went to her mother's gravesite with her brother and she felt happy and said she just remembered the good times she had with her mother, but her brother was still heartbroken. The following week she told me, "I've never in my life been as happy and glad to be alive. Its normal to feel sadness and grief when we lose someone we love, but the Lord does not want us to be stuck in our grief for long. He wants us all to learn to give our grief to Him and let Him carry it for us. 

Set Free from Loss of Daughter    33

A woman came to me who lost her daughter several months ago. She said that she felt sad and tearful all the time and did not feel like going to church, although she was a faithful Christian and regularly attended church for years. Her husband tried to console her but there was nothing that he could do or say to give her any relief. This is considered to be "normal grief" when a person feels deep sorrrow and longing for the deceased person for a year or less and it is especially difficult when a parent loses a child, no matter what age they are, because it is so unnatural and unexpected for a child to die before their parents do. This woman's daughter lived in another state and she had multiple health problems. When she learned that her daughter was dying she drove for 26 hours through inclement weather to see her but she died before this woman arrived, so she had no opportunity to see her for one last time or to hold her in her arms. I asked her what she missed about her daughter and she told me that she missed talking with her over the phone late at night, laughing together with her, and hearing about her children. She also missed her love and affection, and being able to talk with her and be encouraged, going on vacations together, and seeing her during the holidays. We made a list of 16 things she missed about her daughter and then she prayed and asked the Lord to take her grief from her and carry it for her. I asked the Lord if there was anything that He wanted her to know. She said, "He's telling me He has her in heaven, she has her new body, and she is in a safe, wonderful place. She is laughing and enjoying seeing her relatives that are there." I asked her how she felt and she said that she felt love, and was less sad. I asked this woman why she felt sadness and she said she was sad because she will never see her daughter physically again or be able to do things with her. She also was sad because her daughter's son lost his mother, she won't get to see her son grow up, she won't get to see her grandchildren, and because she had so many physical problems and she endured so much pain from the men in her life. She identified nine reasons for her sadness and then prayed and gave all her sadness to the Lord. When I asked the Lord what He wanted her to know she said, "Don't be sad for her; she's got it made. Your sadness will turn to joy and I'm there and will carry you through all this." She said that she felt peaceful in her heart after hearing these words. 

Marriage Helped as A Ton of Bricks is Lifted     34

A woman came for help after struggling several years with grief and depression when her father died. Several years earlier I had prayed with her and she had experienced much healing but when her father died she did not apply what she had learned to dealing with his loss and it led to depression and daily arguments with her husband. We made a list of 22 things she missed about her father and she gave it to the Lord and asked Him to carry it for her. She immediately experienced relief and peace and the next time I saw her she said, "It feels like a ton of bricks was lifted off my shoulders." She said that she had only one argument with her husband in the last two weeks! We talked about her anger toward her husband and made a list of 14 resentments she had toward him. I led her in a prayer and she told the Lord the reasons for her anger and she gave it to Him and asked Him to take it from her. I asked the Lord if there was anything that He wanted her to know and she said, "The Lord is here for me. Everything will be Okay." When I asked her how she felt she said, "He needs me. I need to keep showing him my love." She said that she felt no more anger toward him and she felt hopeful about her marriage. Grief, depression, and anger can destroy a marriage but the Lord can save and heal marriages when the individuals learn how to release these underlying feelings that damage the marriage. Once we release our negative feelings we also have to learn to cast our cares upon Him on a daily basis and not let new resentments build up, or allow new losses to make us depressed. As we give our emotional burdens to Him each day we will be able to continue to enjoy His peace and this will lead to a strong marriage. The apostle Paul tells us "do not let the sun go down on your anger and do not give the devil an opportunity" (Eph. 4:27) in our lives, and this applies to holding onto other negative feelings, as well. Instead, "let the peace of Christ rule in your heart" (Colossians 3:15) and this will lead to a strong and long marriage. 

Missing Kitten Triggers off Unresolved Grief     35

A woman told me that a cat was living under her shed and had a little kitten. When the kitten suddenly disappeared she began frantically looking everywhere for the kitten but could not find her and she felt very sad and upset about it. Then she remembered me telling her that when we overreact emotionally it is always coming from an earlier source, and she said "I went back to the beginning and I couldn't believe how many losses I had." She recalled how she felt when her brother died, and she lost her biological parents, then when a previous husband divorced her, and she lost his family and friends, and she lost contact with her daughter for a period of time. This woman wrote out each of these losses and the things that she missed about each person, spending three or four hours praying to the Lord and giving her grief to Him. When she finished she said that she felt "100% better and was peaceful and calm." She also slept well the following night and said, "I had one of the best nights I have had in a long, long time." She was able to recognize that it wasn't the kitten that upset her so much, it was her former losses that had never been resolved. As she prayed on her own she was able to identify the source of her sadness and to give it all to the Lord. This woman experienced a lot of trauma in her life but she has learned how to take her burdens to the Lord and find relief. The kitten was never found but once this woman resolved her former losses she was no longer upset about it. She had a history of traumatic losses that caused her to overreact to the disappearance of a kitten but she was able to resolve her past losses on her own through prayer. The Lord desires each of us to learn how to find freedom from our emotional struggles just like this woman did, as we learn to recognize where they begin and learn how to take them to the Lord in prayer. Jesus, 

My New Best Friend     36

A woman came for help with her depression which she had had for over twenty years. She was not close to her mother but was very close to her grandfather until he died seven years earlier. He was a good Christian man and a leader in his church, and she missed spending time with him, going to church with him, and seeing him up front in the church and singing in the choir. I explained to this woman how she could be set free from her grief by being completely honest about her grief and giving it to the Lord. When I asked her what she missed about her grandpa she said she missed his wisdom and getting advice from him, and talking with him about the Bible. She said that she missed hearing him tell her that he loved her, sitting with him on his porch and talking, helping him feed the cattle, and riding to town with him in his truck. She also missed seeing his smile, hearing him joking around and kidding her, and seeing his gray hair, his Dicky pants, and the long-sleeved shirts he always wore. After she idenfied twenty things she missed about him I asked her if she would be willing to say a short prayer and tell the Lord these things, then ask the Lord to take her grief from her. She said that she would so I led her in a prayer and she gave her grief to Him. After the prayer I asked her how she felt as she thought about her grandpa. She told me that she only had happy memories and no longer felt any sadness, but she said, "I wish I had someone to talk to for direction." I prayed for her and asked the Lord what He wanted her to know. She smiled and said, "I can go to God and talk to Him. He can be my best friend. God loves me." I didn't have to say a word. These thoughts filled her with joy and comfort. She not only got rid of her grief and sadness but also came to realize the truth that Jesus was now her new best friend and she could always talk to Him and get her advice from Him. "What a friend we have in Jesus!" 

Peace, be Still Peace    37

A young woman in jail asked for prayer. She said that she was certain of her salvation but she had a drug problem that continually got her into trouble. Knowing that there are always underlying emotional issues that lead people to abuse drugs I asked her when she began and what happened just prior to her starting to use drugs. She told me that when she was 12 years old her great grandmother died who was like a mother to her. I shared with her how she could get rid of that pain by being completely honest about her feelings and giving them to the Lord. I asked her what she missed about her grandmother and she said she missed playing bingo with her, watching TV with her, and she missed her cooking. She said that she missed her laughter, her love and affection, her encouragement, her calmness, and her smell. She identified 13 things she missed about her grandmother then said, "she always thought about me and I knew she had my back." I led her in a prayer in which she told the Lord everything she missed about her grandmother, then she asked the Lord to take her grief and sadness and carry it for her. I prayed for her, as I usually do, and asked the Lord if there was anything that He wanted her to know. I told her to be quiet and let me know if any thoughts came into her mind. "He's got my back," she said. "Anything else?" I asked. "He loves me." "Does that feel true?" I asked her, and she affirmed that it did. I asked her how she felt now as she thought about her grandmother and she said, "I feel relieved. I prayed one more time, "Lord, is there anything else that you want her to know?" She immediately said, "Peace be still." I asked her if she knew where this Scripture came from and she didn't so I explained that Jesus was in a boat with his disciples when He fell asleep and a storm arose. The waves began to fill the boat so His disciples began to panic and they woke Him up and asked Him, "Teacher, do you not care that we are perishing?" He stood up and spoke to the wind and the waves and said, "Peace, be still." The disciples were amazed at His power and this woman was amazed at the peace that filled her heart over the loss of her grandmother at age 12. The Lord wants all of us to let Him calm the storms in our lives and to experience His peace. If you are agitated about something today, learn to cast all your cares upon Him, listen to His voice of truth, and let Him replace your pain with His peace.

"I Want to be Happy Again"    38

A woman told me, "I'm a Christian... I'm a disciple of Jesus Christ" but she said she had been depressed and taking antidepressants for over 30 years. She said, "I used to think you won't get depressed if you're a Christian" and "I didn't believe in mental illness" until I got depressed. I asked questions about her background and how her depression began and learned that her mother-in-law died when she was 29 years old and then a baby niece died a year later when she was pregnant with her daughter, and this is when her depression began. She told me that her doctor said she had postpartem depression but I explained that 87% of all depression is rooted in losses and that her depression was probably connected to these losses. Then I explained how she could resolve her losses and she became hopeful and said, "I want to be normal and enjoy things I used to enjoy. I want to be happy again." She said that her greatest sadness at this time was about her mother who died three years ago. She told me that her mother was her closest friend and she missed talking with her all the time, taking care of her, and visiting her in the nursing home. She also missed her sound advice, her encouragement, her positive attitude, laughing and joking with her at the kitchen table, and her sense of humor. We made a list of 15 things she missed about her mother and then we prayed and she told the Lord what she missed about her, then she asked Him to take her grief and carry it for her. I prayed again and asked the Lord if there was anything that He wanted her to know and the only thought that came to her mind was, "She doesn't have to struggle to breathe anymore." "So, how do you feel now as you think about your mother," I asked. She said, "I do feel peaceful." I encouraged her to try to stir up her sadness and grief and she tried but said again, "I do feel better." She said she had no sadness or grief. I asked her what she thought about this and she said, "It's so simple; it's amazing to know the Bible teaches us to give everything to Him. I really am hopeful." This woman had felt hopeless about her depression for 30 years and never thought she would feel good or be happy again but after experiencing peace about the loss of her mother she felt hopeful and happy again. As she continues to pray about her other losses her depression will go away and she will be able to feel normal again; I see this happen all the time. It's sad that so many Christians live with depression like this woman and have believed the lies of the enemy that there is no hope because she was told by her doctor that she had a chemical imbalance. But we have the "God of hope" who wants to "fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that you will abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit" (Romans 15:13). 

Grief over Soldier Son Released     39

A woman told me that she lost her son in Afghanistan 8 months ago. He had promised her that he would retire and raise a famiy after this deployment but she said she had a feeling that he would not return. After she received the shocking news about his death she quit eating for awhile then began taking some psychiatric medications which caused her to gain weight. She was depressed and angry, had outbursts, was unable to sleep, and shook at night while thinking about her son. I shared with her how she could release her grief by making a list of the things she missed about her son and then praying and giving her grief to the Lord. She was desperate for relief and said she was a believer so we began talking about her son and what she missed about him. She said that she missed his smile, his silly attitude, and the smart remarks he often made. He was very mechanical and she missed his practical help, his love of animals, his blunt, honest comments, and his friendship. She also missed his phone calls, his Mother's Day cards, and hearing his voice when he walked in the house and said, "What's up?" We made a list of 18 things she missed about her son then we prayed through this list and told the Lord everything and asked Him to take her sadness from her. I prayed again and asked the Lord if there was anything that He wanted her to know. She reported the following thoughts: "He loved me (tears came to her eyes); he's not hurting anymore and he wouldn't want me to be this way. He wants me to be happy and I have to take care of my other children." I asked her how she felt now. She said, "He's happy and he's watching over us. I'm mellowed out and calm. He's at rest. I feel at ease and peaceful." This grieving mother was finally able to lay her grief to rest and to find peace after losing her son to war. There are many parents and family members like this woman who suffer from war and from losing their loved ones who bravely fought and died for their country. They need people like you and me to help them find rest and peace so that they do not remain depressed and dependent upon medications that do not help. Thankfully we have a great high priest who has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows and who wants to carry our grief for us! 

Grief Released Three Days after Loss Grief     40

A woman told me she had used drugs for many years until she went back to church. She said that she knew that she was saved, but she still had so much anxiety and depression that she was unable to hold a job. She said that she even went to counseling for five years and took psychiatric medications but they were not helping her. Then her father died three days before we met and she was isolating herself from others and couldn't quit crying. She said, "I feel like I'm losing my mind." I learned that she had a long history of physical and sexual abuse that contributed to her depression and anxiety, and even though she was a Christian she could not find freedom from these overpowering emotions. I shared with this woman how she could be set free from her anger, grief, and shame through prayer and she was very receptive to this. Even though she said she was saved and her father was saved and she was confident that he was in heaven and "walking on the streets of gold" she felt shameful and unworthy of God's love so she felt unable to ask God for anything. I prayed and asked the Lord what He wanted her to know about that and she said, "That's not true; I am worthy and He loves me." Those feelings of shame were immediately released and then I asked her what she missed about her father. She said she was afraid to release her grief because she would lose her father if she released her grief. I prayed and asked the Lord if that was true and she immediately said "That's not true." Then she began to talk about her father and how she missed hearing his voice, his strength, and the feeling of safety and protection he gave her. She also missed his love and affection, gardening with him, going to church with him, and seeing his big, strong hands. She identified 20 things she missed about him then she prayed and asked the Lord to take all her grief and sadness and carry it for her. After the prayer she took a deep breath and said she felt calm and peaceful. I asked her what she thought about this and she said, "That's amazing!" Three days after the loss of her father she released her grief and felt peaceful. This woman entered my office feeling like she was losing her mind, but she left smiling and feeling peaceful and hopeful after experiencing God's deliverance from her grief. Five more years of counseling and medications could not do what the Lord did in 30 minutes of prayer. Only the Lord can set people free from such emotional bondage because He is the the Prince of Peace and the Wonderful Counselor! We Will Meet on that

Beautiful Shore Thirty-three Years of Grief Released     41

A man told me that he had been drinking heavily for over thirty years and that it had led to his divorce and to acute liver failure. He was desperate to remain sober but had been involved in AA and completed inpatient treatment several times to no avail. He stated that his heavy drinking began after his uncle, who was also his best friend, died at a young age from a head-on car accident. He was very close to his uncle and admired him and when he died this man said, "I was angry at God after my uncle was killed... and I turned away from God." Thirty years later he still missed him deeply and was saddened by the memory of his death. I asked him if he would like to get rid of his sadness and grief over the loss of his uncle and he said that he would. I asked this man what he missed about his uncle and he told me that he was very close to his uncle who helped him through may trials. He said that he missed his friendship, his charisma, his witty sense of humor, and his passion for life. He missed going on hunting and fishing trips with him, playing music and singing with him, and sharing their interest in Jeeps, music, and 4-wheelers. He missed spending time with him, learning from him, going to church with him, hearing his voice, and just being around him because he enjoyed his time with his uncle who made him feel special. As he talked about his uncle I wrote down a list of 28 things he missed about him, then I led him in a prayer in which he told the Lord everything he missed about his uncle and then asked the Lord to take his grief and sadness and carry it for him. When we finished praying I asked the Lord if there was anything that he wanted this man to know. He said, "We will meet on the beautiful shore; don't carry around this grief." He then prayed and said, "I choose now to give it to you, Lord." I asked the Lord if there was anything else that he wanted this man to know and he said, "He's alright; accept God's plan." He told me, "That's not a thought from me because I don't think like that." I asked him how he felt now and he said, "Relieved and peaceful." He smiled and thanked me and left the room with joy and peace in his heart. After carrying this grief over the loss of his uncle for over thirty years he released it in about thirty minutes and was set free from this grief and sadness. What a joy it is to have the Lord carry our burdens for us and to know that we will meet our saved loved one "on that beautiful shore!"

I Can't Believe How Good I Feel     42

A Christian woman told me that she had been depressed since age 8 when she was molested and she had been taking antidepressants for the last ten years but she was still depressed. As a child she had been molested by five different people and she had been through four marriages and divorces and was abused by three of her husbands. She had at least ten significant losses and was angry at a dozen people who had harmed her significantly but when I asked her what was the most painful event in her life she stated that it was the loss of her maternal grandparents. I shared with her how to overcome her grief through prayer and she was eager to do it. The first step is to be honest about your loss and to make a list of what you miss about the person. She talked about her grandfather and how she missed sitting in his lap and studying the Bible, which made her tearful to remember. She missed his unconditional love, his protectiveness, being his favorite grandchild, his joking and laughter, going places with him in his truck, and seeing him in his gray cowboy hat. She said she missed going to his house, drawing water from their well, and putting wood in the pot-bellied stove. She talked about how much she missed her grandma's cooking, going to her for comfort when she cried, going to their house every Sunday for dinner, and enjoying spending Christmas and Thanksgiving at their house. We made a list of 26 things she missed about her grandparents. This was the first step to freedom. The second step is to pray and ask the Lord to take your grief and carry it for you. She prayed and asked the Lord to take all her grief from her and carry it for her. After this prayer I asked her how she felt. She said she just felt peace "like a weight lifted off my shoulders; I can breathe." She said, "I feel much better. I know he's in heaven and out of pain" and she said that she had never been able to go to their gravesite but now she thought she would like to do that. She rated her depression as a 2, on a 10-point scale and as she left she said, "Oh, my gosh! I can't believe how good I feel!" The Lord lifted her grief that she had carried for 35 years and her depression, which she had since childhood, was almost gone! What an awesome God we have who heals the brokenhearted! 

Miracles in Haiti Miracles in Haiti    43

I just returned from a trip to Haiti where I did a Set Free Seminar on Wednesday and Thursday. In spite of the Seminar being delayed a day due to four solid days of rain in Haiti, we had about 50 pastors come to the Seminar on Wednesday and about 80 on Thursday. Pastor Julio, who invited me, was very passionate about the ministry and seems to fully embrace it. I provided him 1000 copies of the French translation of the booklets on Grief, Anger and Shame and he gave copies to the pastors. Pastor Julio will be my contact person in Haiti and I believe he will spread this ministry there. I am looking for someone who might be interested in paying for the booklets for Haiti from time to time, as they run out and request more, since they cannot afford to buy them. I prayed with two men at the Seminar and both of them received healing. A young man requested prayer over his grief from the loss of his aunt eight years ago. He was very close to her and still misses her greatly so I asked him what he missed about her. He told me that his aunt helped him out financially a lot and he missed her love and affection, her kindness, her sense of humor, playing cards and dominoes with him, and going for walks together. He also missed going to church with her, talking with her, her cooking, and spending holidays with her. We made a list of 17 things he missed about her and then we prayed and he gave his grief to the Lord. After our prayer he said he still felt sad when he sees her children because she worked so hard for her children and they are not doing well and he also felt sad to remember how she suffered so much pain before she died. He prayed again and gave his sadness to the Lord. I asked him how he felt and he told me that he felt peaceful and a lot stronger and he no longer felt any sadness or grief. After this second prayer this young man said he felt some guilt and shame because he could not bear to go visit her when she was dying. He felt he was too weak and he was wrong for not visiting her, so I encouraged him to confess this to the Lord. He bowed his head and confessed his failure to the Lord then I prayed and asked the Lord what he wanted this young man to know. He said that he received the thought that he was forgiven and that felt true to him. He said he no longer felt any sadness, grief, or shame about his aunt. When we finished praying he was smiling and everyone could see the change in this young man and 80 pastors were able to witness this powerful change. I also prayed with another man who had unresolved grief over the loss of his mother five years ago and the Lord set him free. Pray for the Lord to spread this ministry throughout Haiti and see those needy people set free from their emotional bondage so that they can enjoy God's peace.

"Talking won't Help"     44

A teenage girl came for counseling and told me she had previously seen another counselor and it didn't help her; she added that she didn't think talking would help her. She told me that her father killed his father 8 years ago and then killed himself in a murder suicide. After this tragic event her mother began using drugs and abandoned her so she begn living with her grandparents who were good to her but were not affectionate with her and not able to nurture her emotionally. They encouraged her to take some medications but she told me she didn't want to take any drugs because drugs had destroyed her parents. Talking about it would never change anything about that event. She admitted that she was sad and depressed and she said, "I'm an emotional wreck." I explained to her that I found the same to be true for me in 25 years of counseling; nothing helped people who experienced tragic losses, but then 12 years ago I Iearned something that did work. I shared with her an example of a 17 year old boy who lost his cousin tragically and suddenly and how he was healed of his grief throgh prayer. She told me that she had turned from God but a nice young man had invited her to go to church with him and she was planning to go with him. She was willing to try this prayer-based approach and we made a list of 12 things she missed about her father. She said she missed being with him, feeling safe, loved, and protected, she missed his smile and his laughter, and even the smell of oil on him from his work, which made her cry. I led her in a prayer and told the Lord these things then aked Him to take her grief and sadness and carry it for her. When we finished praying she immediately said, "I feel so much better!" I prayed and asked the Lord if there was anything that he wanted her to know and she said, "I know that he loved me." I asked her how he felt and she said, "Stable...calm...relieved." She smiled and thanked me for helping her. She left feeling peaceful and calm without taking any drugs in spite of her skepticism that talking could help her. 

Hope and Peace for Christmas     45

A young lady came to me a few days before Christmas and told me she had been dreading this day. I saw her once before and she had been released from some strong feelings of guilt and shame. But she was dreading talking about the loss of her father several years earlier because his death was so painful to her that it led to a series of problems in her life and to her psychiatric hospitalization. She was so heavily medicated after her hospitalization that she slept all day and was not able to be a good mother, but she didn’t want to live like this. She wanted to be a good mother. She had written out a list of things she missed about her father and we began discussing them. She told me how she missed the crinkles in his eyes, his smile, and even the hair on his arms. She missed his sense of humor, his orneriness, the tricks he pulled on people and the grease that was always on his hands which symbolized his strong work ethic. She missed the long talks they had, the way he cared for her and helped her and was always available to help her when she had problems. He couldn’t sing but she missed hearing him trying to sing, she missed his good advice, and seeing him reading his Bible and meditating on it. We made a list of 36 things she missed about her father and then I led her in a prayer to tell the Lord these things and ask Him to take them from her and carry them. She wept through this prayer and then I prayed and asked the Lord to take her sadness and grief and carry it for her. After the prayer I asked her how she felt. She said, “Not as heavy or weighed down; kind of numb or neutral.” She said she felt “a sense of peace” but she had some sadness and fear of forgetting her dad. She said she was sad that her children lost their grandfather, that her sister was struggling with his death, and that they had not gone camping any since his death. We prayed again and she gave her sadness to the Lord then I asked the Lord if there was anything that He wanted her to know. She smiled and said, “He’s here with me and he’s with God. He’s happy and rejoicing. He misses me, too.” She was still crying when I asked her how she felt now. She said, “Peace. These are ‘letting-go’ tears.” She took a deep breath and I asked her what she thought about this prayer process. She said, “It’s pretty amazing!” We talked about how wonderful it is to feel God’s peace and that the Lord wants us to experience His perfect peace. She was ready now to face Christmas without her father but with peace and joy in her heart and with the confidence that he was happy, too. She stood as she got ready to leave and took another deep breath and smiled real big. She thanked me for praying with her and said, “It’s amazing! Have a wonderful Christmas!” 

Set Free from Grief and Aches & Pains     46

An elderly woman came for help with her grief after losing her husband two months earlier. She had been married to her husband 50 years and now she is facing her first Christmas without him. She was a sweet, Christian woman who attended a Baptist church and she talked about how much she missed her husband. He was retired and spent a lot of time with her talking and working around the house together. He was a good husband who cooked breakfast for her and ran errands for her while she was working. She said that she missed his cheerfulness, his positive attitude, shopping with her, going to church with her, and playing with their dogs and grandchildren. She also missed his sense of humor and the way that he joked with other people. We made a list of 30 things she missed about him and then she prayed and asked the Lord to take her grief and carry it for her. Afterwards she said that she felt a heavy weight lifted from her immediately. The next time she came she said she was "doing a lot better and sleeping and eating better." She told her minister how much better she felt and said, "This really works!" Interestingly, she said "I was aching and hurting all over and I feel so much better now." Her grief had led to much physical suffering and physical pain but that had been lifted along with her emotional pain! She still had some grief, which is not uncommon for someone like this who was married for 50 years to her spouse, so we made another list of 15 more things she missed about her husband. After giving her grief to the Lord she said, "I feel a whole lot has been lifted off my heart! I know he is not hurting anymore; I feel good and feel no more sadness." She said that she felt no more grief or sadness about him because "he is in a safe place" and he wouldn't want her to feel sad or depressed anymore. This woman was a very sweet, sincere believer who had tried to pray and give her grief to the Lord, but she needed to be told how to identify all the things she missed about her husband. In spite of having been married for 50 years to her husband she was able to find complete relief from her "normal grief" after two prayer sessions. Her grief was normal but after two months she was tired of carrying it and she gave it to the Lord and found complete peace again. The Lord does not want us to be stuck in our grief and He has provided a way for us to release it and give it to Him. He is the "Wonderful Counselor" and "Prince of Peace" and He wants us to enjoy the fruits of Spirit, which are love, joy, and peace. May the Lord give you His peace during this Christmas season! 

Nine-Year Old Finds Peace      47

A children’s minister saw a nine-year-old girl sitting in the hallway of the church crying. He asked her why she was crying and she said, “I miss my daddy.” He asked her where her dad was and she said, “he died a year ago and I miss him so much.” A staff member of the church school saw them talking and said, “Susie, you need to go to your class! This girl is always crying about missing her dad and we’ve told her that she just needs to get over it.” The children’s minister told the staff member that he would take her there in a few minutes. He asked the little girl what she missed about her daddy. She told him how much she missed playing with him and going with him to visit a good friend of her father’s. She shared eight things that she really missed about her father. Then the minister asked her if she would like to pray and give her sadness to God, and she said “yes.” He led her in a prayer and she told the Lord what she missed about her father, then she asked Him to take her sadness and carry it for her. The minister asked her how strong her sadness was on a 10-point scale, with 10 being the highest and she said it was a 2. They bowed their heads and the minister prayed for her again and asked God if He had anything He wanted her to know about her father. She said, “God wants me to know that my daddy was with Him and doing fine; I will be okay; and my daddy knows I'm okay.” She was smiling and was no longer sad so the minister took her to her classroom. Three weeks later he asked her how she was doing and she said that she was no longer so sad about her father and she was happy about talking to God. She had a big smile on her face and was getting along well with the other children and doing well in class because this children’s minister knew how to pray with her about her grief and sadness. Most adults don’t know how to help children with their grief and get frustrated with them. Many children in our public schools have anger and grief issues due to family problems, losses, and divorces and then they act up in class or are inattentive. These children are often sent to a school counselor who diagnoses them as having ADD or ADHD and they are placed on medications, rather than dealing with the underlying emotional issues they are facing. Thank God that there is a way to help them resolve their emotional pain through prayer rather than by giving them dangerous drugs that do not solve their problems. Jesus does love the little children and He wants us to teach them how to be set free from their grief, anger, and sadness through prayer. 

Mother Set Free from Tragic Loss     48

A woman came to me and asked for help and when I asked her what brought her she broke into tears and told me that she lost her son in December, seven weeks ago, before Christmas. I told her that I was sorry for her loss and asked her what happened. She said that he was driving home on a highway in foggy conditions and an 18-wheeler pulled out in front of him. He hit the truck broadside and was pinned underneath it for two hours. He was terribly mangled and injured and the neurologist told this woman that if he lived he would be on a ventilator and feeding tube the rest of his life. Three days later he was taken off the machines and he passed away. I empathized with the woman about her loss. She said her husband went back to work after the funeral but she could not stand going to work because she knew she would break down into tears all day long. Her employer told her that she needed to seek counseling. She said that she cried a lot and her husband and two other children were all struggling with the loss. This woman said, “My son was a faithful man to the Lord” and because of his death she got saved two weeks ago and she knew she would see him again, but she was still struggling so much she could not bear to go back to work. I shared with this woman how the Lord can take our burdens from us and carry our grief when we are honest with Him and tell Him what we miss about our loved one, and then give our burden to Him in prayer. She listened intently and said she would like to get rid of her grief. When I asked her what the strongest feeling was that she had she said it was sadness, so I asked her what made her sad. She told me that she didn’t get to say “goodbye” to him or tell him she loved him, she didn’t get to hug him or touch him, he suffered such terrible physical injuries, she was told he would never walk again if he lived, and he would have to be on a ventilator and feeding tube the rest of his life. She was also sad because he died so young and unexpectedly, and because her husband would not talk about her son and they were only communicating about superficial matters. I led her in a prayer and she told the Lord these six reasons for her sadness, then she asked the Lord to take her sadness from her. I asked her how she felt and she a pleasant smile came over her face and said, “Calm; hmh. No sadness.” I asked her how she felt now and after a few moments she said she just missed him. So, I asked her what she missed about him and she told me that she missed seeing his beautiful smile “from ear to ear,” she missed hearing him sing songs while holding a hair brush like a mike, and talking to him on the phone for 45 minutes. She told me that she missed his friendly personality, his joking, his love and affection, spending holidays with him, eating out, and cooking “loaded potatoes” for him, which he loved. She also missed hearing his voice, seeing his spiked hair, and hearing him play his guitar and singing “I Will Rise Again.” She identified 22 things she missed about him and then she prayed and gave her grief to the Lord, and asked Him to take it and carry it for her. After her prayer I asked the Lord if there was anything He wanted her to know. The only thought that came to her was, “He loves me.” I asked her how she felt and she shook her head in amazement and said, “Nothing; just peace.” A big smile came over her face and she said her heart began beating fast from joy. She said she no longer felt depressed or weighed down and she said, “I feel like I did when I knelt at the altar and got saved.” This woman entered my office with heaviness in her heart and left with joy and peace after carrying her grief for seven weeks. The Lord instantly set her free and replaced her pain with His awesome peace! He does heal the brokenhearted and sets the captives free! 

Set Free from Suicidal Urges    49

A young man came to me for help. He said that three weeks earlier he sat alone in his apartment, with a gun to his head. He had been depressed previously since about age 17 because he felt lonely and was alone a lot. But since the death of his stepfather two years earlier he had felt more depressed and his mother had begun drinking heavily. One night he was so depressed that he got drunk and seriously contemplated killing himself, but he did not give in to those urges. He later told his mother about this and she told his boss, who told him to get some help. I explained how to be set free from grief by being completely honest about his losses and listing everything he missed about the person, then giving it all to the Lord. He said that his stepfather was a good Christian man who always took him to church and he was receptive to the concept of giving his grief to the Lord through prayer. He said that his stepfather was “really good” to him and was a calming influence on his mother and himself. This young man felt loved and happy around his stepdad who helped him develop good study and work habits. He missed being around him, hearing his voice, going on trips with him, learning from him, and watching TV with him. He missed his love and affection, working with him, going hunting and going to the gym with him, and learning how to manage his money from him. After listing 26 things he missed about his stepfather he asked the Lord to take his grief from him and carry it for him. I asked the Lord if there was anything that He wanted this man to know and he said, “It’s going to be alright.” Then I asked him how he felt and he said, “Good. It feels like everything lifted. I feel safe. Everything is going to be fine.” He said that he even felt happy and relieved. I asked if he had any other negative feelings and he said he felt sad because his stepfather suffered for three years, he deteriorated from being a very strong, capable man to being disabled and unable to walk. He was also sad because his family lost their closeness after his death and because he could no longer go to him for advice. The young man prayed again and gave these five reasons for his sadness to the Lord. I asked the Lord, again, if there was anything He wanted this man to know. He said, “It’s going to be alright.” I asked him how he felt and he said, “It’s all been expelled; there’s no more sadness.” When he left he was cheerful and smiling. His burden had been lifted and all his depression and grief were gone. He had some other losses that he needed to resolve and he had some anger toward his biological father that he needed to release but the heavy depression and sadness were gone and he set an appointment to return. In less than an hour he released the deep grief that he had carried for two years and replaced it with God’s wonderful peace!

“I Believe in Miracles”     50

A woman told me how depressed she was and she had been taking psychiatric medications for a long time but she was still very depressed, and she looked depressed. I gathered background information to understand the origin of her depression and she told me that she was not depressed as a child but became depressed after her brother died twenty years earlier. We ran out of time so I did not have time to explain to her how to be set free. When I saw her again I asked her how she was feeling and she said she felt better. I asked her how strong her depression was, on a 10-point scale, and she rated it a 9! She was still very depressed! I explained that 87% of all depression is rooted in grief and she had eight significant losses that contributed to her depression that began twenty years ago. So, I asked her which loss was the most difficult for her and she said it was the loss of her mother seven years ago. I asked her if she would like to get rid of her sadness and grief over this loss and she said she would. I explained how she could release her grief and sadness by identifying the specific things she missed about her mother, and then giving her grief to God by praying. She immediately said she was okay with this because she was a believer. She told me how she missed seeing her mother and being with her, she missed talking with her, going to yard sales with her, and traveling with her. This woman said she missed her mother’s smile, her laughter, her honesty, and her goofiness. She recalled many good memories of her mother and she identified 22 things she missed about her then we prayed and she asked the Lord to take her grief and sadness from her. After praying I asked the Lord if there was anything He wanted her to know. She told me that she felt some relief immediately and she said, “I know she’s in a better place and I know I will see her again.” I asked her how that made her feel and she said, “It makes me feel wonderful!” I asked her how she felt now as she thought about her mother. She said, “I feel like a weight has been taken off me. I feel so relieved. I feel good! I can see her [in her mind] and I’m not crying.” She began smiling and then she laughed and her smile grew. I asked her what she thought about this prayer process. She said, “I believe in miracles. I just never thought about praying about what I missed about her.” She told me that she was surprised at how quickly her grief left her and she said, “God is the reason I’m here because I did not want to come this morning but He made me go.” When she left the room she still had a huge smile on her face in stark contrast to how she looked when she entered. God does do miracles and every time I see people relieved from years of grief and depression I know it is a miracle because nothing this world has to offer can set you free from grief like this. This woman was right; God still does miracles today! 

What did you do? That’s Crazy!     51

A young lady came to me for help with her depression. She said that she had been depressed her whole life, since age 11 when her father died. She was raised by her grandparents most of her life because her parents were drug addicts but she did love her parents and her father’s death was hard for her. For two years she lived with her mother after she quit using drugs and she became very close to her, but then when she was 15 years old her mother died. This was extremely traumatic to her and made her more depressed but then three years later her only brother died. Her grandparents were still living but they were not close to her like her parents. I shared with this young lady how she could be set free from her grief by being completely honest and making a list of what she missed about each person, and then praying and giving her grief to the Lord. She was very receptive to this and said she would do that on her own before our next session. The next time I saw her she had not prayed on her own and she asked for help with it. I asked her what she missed about her mother. She said she missed smelling her mother’s perfume, holding her rough hands, seeing her beautiful, long, curly hair and her soft, dark-complected skin, and hearing her voice. She missed her mother calling her “Baby Doll,” she missed her goofiness and sense of humor, her cooking, and her mother holding her when she was upset. She missed talking to her about everything, being her best friend, telling her about her father, and telling her five or six times that she loved her before she went to bed. She also missed shopping with her, going on trips together, watching TV together, listening to music, and just being with her. She identified 32 things she missed about her mother and then she prayed and told the Lord these things and asked Him to take her grief and sadness from her. I asked her how she felt and she said, “I feel better; peaceful.” Then she motioned with her hands and said, “I feel it was lifted from me!” She broke into a big smile and said, “What did you do? That’s crazy!” We talked about how simple it was to release her grief and she was smiling and ecstatic. Before she left I asked her one more time how she felt, now. She smiled real big and said, “Happy! When I think about it, it’s all smiles!” What a tragic thing it is for a young person like this to lose both parents and their siblings. Anyone can understand how this could lead to depression but the Lord is able to take away all our sadness and grief and depression and replace it with His peace because He is the “Prince of Peace” and the “Wonderful Counselor!” He will take your grief and sadness and depression, too, if you will give it all to Him and ask Him to carry it for you. “Surely He has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows” (Isaiah 53:4).

I Hope this Works!     52

A woman came to me for help with her anxiety attacks that had occurred constantly for the last ten years. She had taken antianxiety medications but she was constantly fearful of running out of her meds and she was fearful of becoming addicted to them. I asked her what happened to trigger off her anxieties ten years earlier and she told me that her son was deployed in the military to Iraq for four tours, and her mother had died that same year. I spoke with her about how to resolve feelings of grief through prayer and she was a religious woman and was willing to try it. I asked her what she missed the most about her mother. She said that her mother was a wonderful, warm person and she missed her love and affection and her love for her children, grandchildren, and her pets. She also had a silly sense of humor that this woman missed. She missed talking with her, taking walks with her, her cooking, her smile, her strength. She made a list of 25 things she missed about her mother and then I led her in a prayer and she gave her grief to the Lord and asked Him to take her grief and carry it for her. After the prayer I asked the Lord if He had anything that He wanted her to know. She had no thoughts come to her mind but she said, “I hope this works.” I asked her to think about her mother and tell me how she felt. She said, “I feel calmer now. I know she’s at peace.” I asked her again how she felt and she said she had “a fuzzy feeling.” She left feeling peaceful and calm. Two weeks later this woman returned I asked her how she had been doing. She said she left feeling a lot better but was afraid to talk about her mother, then she deliberately thought about her to see if she would cry or feel any painful emotions and she didn’t. I asked her what she thought about this and she said, “It’s amazing; it’s amazing; it’s amazing!” This woman was skeptical that she could release her feelings of grief through prayer but in spite of her skepticism she found healing of her grief. She also told me a month later that she was able to think about her mother without any painful emotions and she had begun taking a lot less medication. She exclaimed, “That’s been a dramatic improvement!” She has begun to experience the radical transformation that occurs as we learn to cast all our cares upon Him and are set free from our fears, grief, and anger as they are replaced with His peace. 

Critical Mother Releases Grief     53

A woman came for help with her young daughter who was fighting a lot with her younger brother. The mother admitted that she was probably too critical of the girl, like her own father was with her as she was growing up, and she hinted that this might be the reason her daughter was fighting so much with her brother. She said that she also suffered from anxiety attacks and anger and had been taking an antidepressant for the last several years. I asked her when she first had an anxiety attack and she told me it was at about age 12 when her mother died from cancer. She became very tearful as she began talking about her mother and when I asked her if she would like to get rid of that sadness she said she was afraid to let it go because then she would lose her mother completely. I clarified that she would not lose any memory but just the sadness connected to the memory of her mother, and she agreed that she would like to release it. I explained to her that she needed to do two thing: first, she needed to be honest about her grief by listing everything she missed about her mother, and second, she needed to say a prayer and tell the Lord what she missed about her mother and ask Him to take her grief and carry it for her. She began talking about her mother and said that she missed her being here with her, it made her sad that her children don’t know her, and she had no one to give her motherly advice. She also said she missed her mother’s love and affection, her sense of humor, her laughter and smile, her scent and perfume, her bubbly personality, and her organization. She cried as she talked about her mother and her memories of her from 25 years earlier of going to Walmart with her, going for walks, and riding bicycles with her. We identified 24 things that she missed about her mother and then she prayed and asked the Lord to take her grief and sadness from her. After the prayer I asked the Lord if there was anything that He wanted her to know. She said, “I will be with her again one day,” and she said that thought felt true. Then I asked her how she felt as she thought about her mother. She took a deep breath and said, “I feel lighter; I can breathe deeply now.” I told her to think about her mother and everything that she missed about her and see how she felt. She said she felt calm and she said, “I feel a lot better.” She had a big smile on her face and left with joy and peace in her heart. With this sense of peace she felt she will be more patient with her daughter, but she agreed to return for more prayer. It is a difficult job being a parent, and unresolved feelings from our past can make us cranky and angry, and lead us to overreact to our children. This woman recognized that her past was probably interfering with her parenting and she wisely sought help. As she continues to get released from all of her anger, grief, and anxieties from her past it will give her peace and enable her to be the best parent possible. The Bible calls this a “gentle and quiet spirit” and says it is “precious in the sight of God” (1 Peter 3:4). May God give each of us this gentle and quiet spirit as we begin to release all our past hurts and pains so that we can be the kind of parents and spouses that we desire to be. 

Girl Prays on Own to Release Grief     54

A girl was brought to me after her parents learned that she had suicidal thoughts and had been cutting on herself. She was very pleasant and did not appear depressed but admitted that she had suicidal thoughts. I gathered background information on her to identify the source of her depression and she disclosed that she had eleven significant losses in the last ten years. I explained to her and her parents that 87% of all depression is rooted in losses and asked her which loss was the most troubling to her. She told me that the loss of her maternal grandmother a year ago was the most painful to her. I shared with this young lady, and her parents, how she could get rid of her grief by making a list of the things she missed about her grandmother and then praying and asking God to take it from her and carry it for her. She believed in God and went to church but was uncomfortable with the idea of praying with me so I told her she could do this by herself at home. I set up an appointment to see her again the next day due to her admission that she was having suicidal thoughts. When she came the next day I asked her how she was doing and she said she had a good evening and had no more urges to cut herself, and she was not depressed. I asked why she felt better and she said she did what I suggested and made a list of the things she missed about her grandmother. She pulled out the list and showed it to me and she had written out 23 things she missed. She said she prayed to God and asked Him to take away her grief and she immediately felt better, slept well, and felt no more sadness. She did all this on her own! I asked her who else she missed a lot and she told me she missed her maternal grandfather. She agreed to let me help her make a list of things she missed about him and she identified twenty things she missed about him. She told me how she missed fishing with him, camping with him, watching TV with him, and sitting on the porch watching nature with him. She also missed his love and affection for her, his big smile when she entered the room, his sense of humor, and sitting on his lap with her puppy while watching TV. I asked her if she would be willing to let me lead her in a prayer to give all her sadness to the Lord and this time she gave me permission. She prayed and gave all her grief to Him and then said she felt “a lot better.” She told me that she actually felt happy! Since she was feeling so good I set up a session for the following week. When she returned the next week she said she still felt “a lot better” and had no suicidal thoughts or urges to cut herself in the last week. Her parents were thrilled and amazed at how much her mood had changed. We prayed some more, this time about her anger toward her biological father and some grief over the loss of an aunt who died. She received complete healing for these painful emotions and when she told her parents how she had prayed about her father and felt no more anger or sadness they were even more excited. They are all amazed at the greatness of God to set her free from her destructive impulses! 

Prayer Versus Meds and Grief Counseling     55

A woman came to me for help with her depression. She had been taking antidepressants for three years since her father had died, but they were not helping much; she was still very depressed. I asked her if she had ever had any counseling and she said that she received some grief counseling from a pastor but said it didn’t help either. I asked this woman when she first became depressed and she told me it was three years ago when her father died. She had never had any depression previously and she had no other mental health issues previously. She grew up in a Christian home with a mother who was loving and affectionate and was actively involved in her church. Her father was an alcoholic and was mean to her mother when drunk, but he never mistreated this woman. She never used drugs or alcohol and she remained married to the same man for 34 years. When her father died she became depressed, then a year later her brother died, and the following year she went through a divorce, and her mother developed Alzheimer’s and now she doesn’t even know her daughter. These were four significant losses in the last four years. I shared with this woman how she could overcome her grief by two simple steps: First, she needed to be honest about her grief and make a list of what she missed about the person. Second, she needed to tell the Lord what she missed about the person and ask Him to take her grief from her. She told me that the loss of her brother was the most difficult for her because he was her lifelong friend. She talked about watching football with him every Sunday, going fishing with him and playing tetherball and basketball with him, walking to school with him, staying up late at night and watching TV together and eating, and many other activities they enjoyed together. She said she missed his calm, easy-going personality, his funny, witty sense of humor, and talking to him on the phone. She missed spending the holidays with him and him helping her in the kitchen. She identified 17 things she missed about him and then prayed and asked the Lord to take her grief and sadness from her. After we prayed I asked her how she felt and she smiled and said she missed him but the sadness and grief were gone. Taking medications for three years and getting grief counseling did not help her with this grief, but a few minutes of prayer did. She agreed to make a list of what she missed about her father and try to release that on her own. After she releases these four losses her depression will lift and she will be able to wean herself slowly off her medications. It’s awesome to see the Lord set people free from grief and depression. Medications are very ineffective, at best, and at worst they can lead to suicidal thoughts and violence. Grief counseling is also very ineffective, according to the leading researchers in the field, but grief is the cause of 87% of all depression. Praise God that He heals the brokenhearted and sets the captives without dangerous medications.

I feel Kind of Drunk or High     56

A woman came for help with her anxiety, depression, and drinking. As a child she was sexually abused and after a serious accident at age 16 she began having panic attacks and began taking a strong anti-anxiety medication. She got married at age 18 but he divorced her when she was 22 years old and this led her to become depressed and to begin taking antidepressants and to drinking. After six abusive marriages and painful divorces and receiving several DUIs she was desperate for help and she took Antabuse to help her quit drinking. She had been sober for several months when I first saw her and she said she was reading her Bible every day and praying a lot to try to stay sober. She had a long list of losses and sources of anger and I explained to her how she could be set free by making a list of the reasons for her anger or grief toward each person on her list, and then praying and asking the Lord to take her anger and grief from her. She was very receptive to trying this and said that she would like to get rid of her grief over the loss of her first husband. Not only had she lost him when they divorced, but he was brutally murdered several years later. She talked about what a good man he was, how he was so loving and good to her, how he was such a good father to their son, and how he was always laughing and smiling. She missed their friendship, spending time with his family, fishing with him, going for walks with him, and going to church with him. She identified sixteen things she missed about her husband then she prayed and asked the Lord to take her grief from her. I prayed and asked the Lord if there was anything that He wanted her to know. She instantly began crying and said, “I know it’s from Him. He said it’s not my fault that he died, I am a good person, I’m not bad.” She said, “That’s huge! That took so much off my chest!” She began smiling and when I asked her how she felt she said, “My chest is not heavy anymore. It’s almost a high, like I took an Ativan pill. That’s unreal!” She continued exclaiming, “I thought I would always feel that pain. Now, I can giggle over him. I can see his smile. I feel kind of drunk or high!” This woman had carried this pain for over twenty years and the sudden release of all her grief and sadness over her first husband lifted her spirits and filled her with joy. She left with peace and joy in her heart, and excitement about how the Lord had so suddenly removed her emotional pain and grief. She will need more praying and healing to be completely set free from her past but this was an awesome first step for her to show her how the Lord can set her completely free as she continues to pray and cast all her cares upon Him. 

Grief Released over Alzheimers Victim    57

A woman came for help with her depression which she developed after going through a divorce. She had previously released grief over the loss of her father and brother and her depression dropped from a rating of 8 to 3, on a 10-point scale, so she was doing much better. However, she also was sad and depressed about her mother's declining health since she was diagnosed with Alzheimers. She had always been very close to her mother, especially since her father was an alcoholic who became abusive when he was drunk, but her mother was loving to her and took her to church. Her mother had a beautiful voice and often sang in church and weddings. Three years earlier she was diagnosed with Alzheimer's and her condition deteriorated very rapidly so that now her mother does not even recognize her, although she smiles and waves at her when she arrives, but she does this with everyone. We discusssed how she has already lost her mother even though she is still alive, because she is not the person she was. I asked her what she missed about her mother and she told me how she missed watching TV with her and football games, she missed her cooking, shopping with her, talking with her, and receiving phone calls from her every day. She also missed fishing with her, picking wild flowers with her, going to visit her grandmother, and laughing together. She identified 18 things she missed about her mother. We had prayed previously about other losses and she understood that this was the first step toward releasing her grief, to make a list of everything she missed about her. The second step is to give her grief to the Lord by telling Him what she misses about her mother and then asking Him to take it from her and carry it for her. She gave her grief to the Lord and then identified three things that made her sad about her mother's condition and gave them to the Lord, also. Afterwards, I asked her to think about her mother and tell me how she felt. She said, "She doesn't know who I am but I know who she is and all I can do is show her love." I asked her, again, how she felt and she said, "I feel better. I miss her but I will do more with her now. I feel a lot better." I asked her to rate her depression again, and she rated it as a 1, on a 10-point scale. Her depression was completely gone after releasing her sadness and grief over the loss of her mother to Alzheimer's. It's a very sad thing to watch a loved family member deteriorate physically and lose their personality and memory due to a medical condition like this, and it can lead to depression, but the Lord can take that grief and carry it for you as you learn to cast all your cares upon Him. 

Pastor Grief Counseling Fails    58

A woman came to me for help with her depression. She had been taking antidepressants for three years since her father had died, but they were not helping much; she was still very depressed. I asked her if she had ever had any counseling and she said that she received some grief counseling from a pastor but said it didn’t help either. This is not to fault the pastor because grief counseling doesn't work and routine prayer does not work either, but the knowledge of a simple, effective way to help people overcome grief is very available to pastors in this area. According to a 2003 "Report on Bereavement and Grief Research" that was written by 23 of the top researchers in the field of grief counseling, nothing helps resolve grief and subsequent studies have failed to provide any significant hope in the field of grief counseling. In 2002 I learned a very simple, prayer-based way to help people overcome grief through prayer, and I learned this from a Pastoral Counselor. I have tried for five years to share this with pastors and Christians in my county and some Christians have learned how to do it very effectively. What amazes me is that all pastors do not jump at this and teach it in their churches to help church members deal with their grief. I have been doing seminars for five years and writing stories each month in a local monthly newsletter, but very few pastors come to the seminars or teach this powerful prayer process to their congregations. This woman said she first became depressed three years ago when her father died. She had never had any depression previously and she had no other mental health issues previously. She grew up in a Christian home with a mother who was loving and affectionate and was actively involved in her church. Her father was an alcoholic and was unkind to her mother when drunk, but he never mistreated this woman. She never used drugs or alcohol and she remained married to the same man for 34 years. When her father died she became depressed, then a year later her brother died, and the following year her mother developed serious health problems, and she lost contact with her grandson. These were four significant losses in the last four years that led to her depression, so I began praying with her about each of these losses. I shared with this woman how she could overcome her grief by two simple steps: First, she needed to be honest about her grief and make a list of what she missed about the person. Second, she needed to tell the Lord what she missed about the person and ask Him to take her grief from her. We first talked about her brother and she identified 17 things she missed about him and then prayed and asked the Lord to take her grief and sadness from her. After we prayed I asked her how she felt and she smiled and said she missed him but the sadness and grief were gone. Taking medications for three years and getting grief counseling did not help her with this grief, but a few minutes of prayer did. It doesn't take a mental health professional to do this; in fact, secular counselors cannot show clients how to overcome grief and do not believe it is even possible. We met again and talked about this woman's loss of contact with her 3-year-old grandson and she identified 16 things she missed about her grandson and 5 reasons for her sadness. She prayed and gave this grief and sadness to the Lord, and she felt much better. We then prayed about the loss of her father and she identified 15 things she missed about him and four reasons for some sadness. Afterwards, she told me that she felt better and had no more grief or sadness or guilt. She said, "I miss him but I remember all the good times." Then in another session we talked about her mother and she identified 18 things that saddened her about her mother's health and she gave this sadness to the Lord. The next time I saw her she said that she still visits her mother but that she used to cry when she left her, but now she enjoys seeing her and leaves feeling peaceful and happy. I asked her to rate her depression again, and she told me that she was doing well and felt no depression. The Lord has set this woman free from her four losses and after just five prayer sessions set her free from her depression. We are being told by medical professionals that depression is a "brain disorder" or a "chemical imbalance" but research has shown that 87% of all depression is rooted in loss. When people learn to pray about their emotions and give them to the Lord, they will be set free from their grief and most depression without the use of any dangerous or ineffective medications. Praise God that He heals the brokenhearted and sets emotional captives free through prayer. 

Baby Dies in Mother's Arms       59  

A woman came to me for help with her depression, anxiety, and PTSD. She was in a stable marriage and had two children, but had some serious, life-threatening medical problems. She had a lot of unresolved feelings of anger, grief, sadness, and shame and I shared with her how she could release feelings through prayer. She said, “I’m willing to try anything.” The greatest source of her anxieties was the loss of her 2-year-old son several years ago, due to a rare heart condition. All his life her son had been restricted to bed and had been hooked up to IVs and ventilators, but in spite of all the medical treatments his condition worsened. She held him and loved him, and enjoyed watching “Curious George” with him, and sleeping with him, but never got to feed him or play with him like a normal child. In spite of his suffering he smiled at everything and bravely fought for his life. She lovingly held him in her arms when he looked at her for the last time, closed his eyes, and then passed away. The intense sadness and trauma of this loss led to sleeplessness and anxiety. When another child of hers was diagnosed with a medical problem, this triggered off fears that she will lose another child. She said that her strongest feeling was anger so we talked about it. She was angry at God because her son had to suffer all his life and had to be restricted to bed all his life. It made her angry to see all the drug-abusing mothers who had healthy babies that lived, and to see other babies with the same condition as her son who lived, and she was angry that God took her son. I led her in a prayer and she told God why she was angry at Him then asked Him to take it from her. I asked the Lord what He wanted her to know and she said, “He doesn’t have any more tubes in him. He’s smiling and playing; He’s not strapped down anymore. He’s happy!” She had a visual image of him playing and smiling and all her anger toward God was gone. We talked about her grief and what she missed about her son. She identified seven things she missed about him, then she prayed and gave her grief to the Lord. I asked the Lord, again, what He wanted her to know. She began laughing, then crying, and said, “My grandma is rocking him and my grandpa is with him. He’s happy!” She said, “I still miss him but I feel at peace!” She had some feelings of guilt and shame and felt she was a bad mother, so I prayed and asked the Lord what He wanted her to know. The thoughts that came to her mind were, “He was suffering; I didn’t kill him. He was tired and didn’t have much fight left in him. He’s not suffering now.” Her feelings of shame were removed as the Lord brought these truths to her. Finally, we talked about her sadness that he died so young, he missed out on so much, he went through so many treatments that did not help, he never got to play like a normal child, he didn’t get to know his brother and sister, and she never got to see him grow up. She spoke to the Lord and asked Him to take her sadness from her. I asked the Lord, again, what He wanted her to know and she said, “My grandma is feeding him and he’s growing. He sees his brother and sister. My grandparents are taking care of him and he’s not alone and is not suffering.” She left the room smiling and happy as the Lord took all her emotional pain and replaced it with His peace. What a wonderful experience it is to see the Lord set someone free from such a traumatic loss as this woman had. Jesus is truly the Wonderful Counselor and the Prince of Peace! 

Twenty-four Years of Grief Released     60

A woman came for help with her anxiety and anger. She had recently been demoted on her job for being too harsh with her employees, and given a lower paying job. She had a son living with her who had graduated from high school but had never gotten a job, and another son had just been released from prison for drug charges who was also unemployed. Her ex-husband was living with her and working but was not helping her pay the bills, so she was angry about this. We discussed her history and she told me that she lost her grandmother at age 10 and this was traumatic for her. At age 14 she got pregnant by her boyfriend, who married her but two years later divorced her and won full custody of their child, which depressed her. Then her mother died suddenly of a heart attack when she was only 16 years old, and she became more depressed and began using drugs and drinking. She would eventually marry two more times and have two more children, and at age 31 her father also died. She was now supporting her two sons and her former husband. This woman wanted help with her anxiety and her anger, and her physician prescribed her an anti-anxiety medication. I shared with her how to get rid of anger by making a list of the reasons for her anger and then giving them to God in prayer. She said that she believed in prayer and had grown up going to church, but she had not gone to church or prayed for a long time. She said she would like to pray about her anger and grief at our next session. When I saw this woman again she told me that she didn’t believe the medication was helping because she was still anxious, but she had started praying and giving her anger to God and she felt it had helped. She said she was still upset about the loss of her parents, especially her mother who died 24 years ago. I asked her what she missed about her mother, and she immediately became tearful. She said she missed her mother being with her and spending time with her. She missed talking to her about everything, cooking for her children and taking care of them, and she missed her love and affection. She missed seeing her mother sitting in the dining room with her mother, talking and drinking coffee. She missed her mother taking them on vacations, having fun with her, and cheering her up when she was upset. This woman went on and on recalling her good memories of her mother and identifying 32 things she missed about her mother. I asked her if she wanted me to lead her in a prayer to give her grief to the Lord. She became very tearful and said she could not pray out loud due to her crying, so I led her in a prayer while she silently repeated it. She cried through the entire prayer, and then I prayed and asked the Lord if there was anything He wanted her to know. She said, “She’s in heaven with her mother; she’s not alone anymore. I can see them sitting and drinking coffee together.” She began smiling and said, “I can’t wait to go home and look at pictures of her.” She was still smiling when she left, and she said she was looking forward to praying about her sadness, also, and her grief over the loss of her father. It was wonderful to see this woman smiling after tragically losing her mother at age 16 and carrying this grief for 24 years.

Twenty Years of Grief Released     61

A woman came for help with anger, anxiety, and depression. We discussed her background and I learned that she lost her father, and was rejected by her mother, and was feeling angry and hurt by her stepson. I shared with her how to overcome grief by making a list of what she missed about someone, then praying and giving it to God. When she returned she told me she had made a list of 13 things she missed about her father, and she thought it might help her release her grief, but it didn’t. She said that she missed him but she was tired of being sad. She had not prayed about her list so I asked permission to lead her in a prayer and she prayed with me and asked the Lord to take her grief from her. After the prayer she said she still felt sad because her father died so young, and he missed out on so much, and he was not there to support her. She also thought of three more things she missed about him. So we prayed again and she gave her sadness and grief to the Lord. After this second prayer, she said she just felt guilty. She said she didn’t go on that last camping trip with him when he died in a wreck, and she believes that if she had been with him he would not have died. I prayed and asked the Lord if that was true and I asked him if there was anything He wanted her to know. After a brief period of quiet contemplation she said, “Everything happens for a reason.” I asked her how she felt now, and she said, “Not guilty. I feel good and peaceful.” This woman made up a list on her own of the things that she missed about her father, but it takes more than a list to get rid of grief. It requires prayer also. But she had feelings of grief, sadness, and guilt so we had to pray about each of these feelings before she finally got peace. She was visibly much more calm when she left, smiling, and joking with me. After 20 years of carrying this grief and sadness she was able to release it through prayer. 

Twenty-four Years of Grief Released     62

A woman told me that she had been depressed for 24 years, since the death of the grandfather, and had been taking antidepressants for 24 years. But in spite of her medications she was still very depressed and she had many other signficant losses that compounded her problems and increased her depression. I shared with her how she could resolve these losses through prayer and she was eager to try it. She explained to me that her father had left her mother and her grandfather lived with them when she was very young. He spent time with her, talked with her, spoiled her, and sat with her in their back yard "watching the weeds grow." She enjoyed coming home from school and being greeted by him, while her mother was working, and they watched baseball games together. She missed watching movies with him, hearing his voice and laughter, and he taught her how to drive and bought her first car for her. She also missed his love and affection and hearing him call her by her nickname. As she talked about him she cried, as the memories surfaced. After she identified 25 things she missed about him, I led her in a prayer and she told the Lord what she missed about her grandfather, and she asked the Lord to take her grief from her. She cried through the entire prayer, then I asked the Lord if there was anything that He wanted her to know. All that she said was "I keep hearing him laughing and talking" and she said she felt good. But she also said she felt "regret." I asked her what she regretted and she said, "He remarried and moved away, he was unhappy there and he gave up, he died while he was gone and I never got to tell him how much I loved him, and he never got to see my kids grow up." These were feelings of sadness that she had, rather than regrets, so I led her in a prayer and she wept through the prayer and then gave her sadness to the Lord. Again, I asked the Lord what He wanted her to know, and she said, "I remember that I learned at his funeral that he received my letters telling him about my kids and he enjoyed reading them, and he knew that I loved him. I asked this woman how she felt while thinking about her grandfather. She had already quit crying and she said that she felt cam and peaceful. We spoke a few minutes after that and she began smiling, and when she left my office she was calm and cheerful. The Lord set her free from this loss after a few minutes of prayer, after being depressed over this loss and taking antidepressants for 24 years. It is normal to feel grief, even deep grief, for a period of time after we lose a loved one, but He does not want us to remain in that state for long. He wants to carry our burdens for us and to give us His peace. He said, "Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you" (John 14:27). The world cannot give us this type of peace; it comes only from Him. 

Set Free from Grief and Anger at Driver     63

A woman came for help with her depression. She had been depressed since childhood due to being abused as a child, but her depression intensified in adulthood due to five miscarriages, loss of her grandmother in a car wreck, and loss of her uncle who helped raise her. When I initially saw her there was inadequate time to lead her through a prayer, but she indicated that she was a Christian and was receptive to prayer as a way of releasing her grief and anger. When we met the second time she prayed about her anger toward her abusive stepfather and was able to release it. She said that she felt a weight lifted. Then we discussed her most significant loss, the loss of her grandmother who died in a car wreck when this woman was driving along a highway and their car was broadsided by another car that ran a stop sign and killed her. She was very close to her grandmother and spent a lot of time with her in her childhood talking and reading the Bible. She said she missed her love and affection, her sense of humor, her cooking, her laughter, her cheerful humming of songs, and the great stories she told about her childhood. She identified 21 things she missed about her grandmother, then she tearfully prayed and asked the Lord to take her grief from her. She said that she felt lighter and was glad that her grandmother was no longer struggling with dementia and that she with grandpa again. She felt no more grief over her grandmother but she admitted that she was very angry at the driver of the car that killed her grandmother because the woman claimed that she stopped at the intersection. She never apologized or expressed any remorse for killing this woman's elderly grandmother and there were no other consequences for her than receiving a ticket for running a stop sign. One person died from the accident and two others were injured and were still suffering from the accident, but the woman who caused the accident only received a ticket. I told this woman that her anger was justified then I asked her if she would like to get rid of it. She tearfully stated that she felt she needed to hold onto her anger to control the woman who killed her grandmother, so I prayed for her and asked the Lord what He wanted her to know about this belief. She said that Ephesians 4 came to her mind which says, "Be angry, and yet do not sin. Do not let the sun go down on your anger." She then agreed to release her anger and I led her in a prayer and she told the Lord eight reasons for her anger, and asked Him to take her anger and carry it for her. Afterwards, she said she felt exhausted but lighter. She was no longer angry at the driver and she even felt sorry for her because she is not a Christian. She was relieved to release this grief and anger after carrying it for nine years and it had intensified her depression for nine years. She left my office feeling peaceful and calm and much lighter than when she had entered. 

Woman Releases Anger and Grief over Loss of Child     64

A woman came for help with her depression and anxiety, after going to an emergency room for panic attacks. She said that she had anxiety attacks three days in a row after she quit her job due to the stress in it. What bothered her the most was that a month ago she lost custody of a child whom she had raised for two and a half years. She was caring for a 3-year-old boy whom she had hoped to adopt, but the biological mother took him back so that she could continue to get food stamps and some government assistance. This woman was extremely distraught at losing this child and angry at his mother because of the way that she uses him and periodically abandons him. She was angry that this woman became pregnant again and had already arranged to have someone else adopt the baby. We made a list of 8 reasons for her anger toward this mother and she prayed and gave her anger to the Lord. After the prayer, this woman no longer had any anger, but felt a lot of grief over the loss of the child. She missed getting him ready for bed at night, doing his laundry, having him wake her up in the mornings, feeding him, holding him, dressing him, and showing him love and affection. She identified 15 things she missed about him and then prayed and asked the Lord to take her grief from her. After giving the Lord her grief and sadness, she said that she felt calm and had the thought, "Everything's going to be okay," which felt true to her. This woman said she still felt some anxiety and fear that something terrible was going to happen. I asked her when was the first time she felt this way; she said it was when she was sexually abused as a child and she felt like she was dirty and was going crazy. I prayed for the Lord to bring truth to her regarding these beliefs and she replied, "I was not dirty; I'm not going to be hurt again. I'm going to be okay." She suddenly calmed down and said she felt much better, as the Lord took her anxiety and gave her peace. Her beliefs from her childhood sexual abuse had been reawakened by this experience, but the Lord brought her truth that set her free. After praying about her anger, grief, sadness, and fears she was calm and felt peaceful. It's a very traumatic experience to lose a child, and it led this woman to become very depressed and to have panic attacks. Pills won't take away these feelings, but the Lord will, when we learn how to pray effectively about our feelings. He wants us to experience His peace that surpasses comprehension and to not live in fear and depression. 

Grief and the Gospel     65

A young man came for help with his anger. He was not a believer but he was receptive to prayer, so we prayed several times and he got rid of some anger. He was amazed that each time he prayed his anger diminished in an unmistakable way. He also told me that he lost an aunt in the previous year and he missed her a lot, so I explained that he can get rid of grief in the same way as he does anger, by making a list of what he missed about his aunt and then giving it to God in prayer. I asked him what he missed about his aunt and he said he missed the fun times they had together, helping her walk with her back problems, talking to her, and staying with her for a few days when needed. He also missed her smile, her laughter, her affection, her positive attitude, cooking for her, doing crafts with her, and watching cop shows on tv with her. He identified 15 things he missed about her then he prayed and asked the Lord to take his grief from him and replace it with His peace. After leading him in a prayer, I prayed again and asked the Lord what He wanted this young man to know. The young man said, "She is in a better place and one day I can see her again." He said that he always felt that he'd never see her again and it made him happy that he could see her again. I asked him if he believed in heaven and believed he would go there. He said that he believed in heaven, but he wasn't sure he was going there. I asked him if he would like to be 100% sure that he was going to heaven, and he said he would. I shared the gospel with him using the "Overcoming Doubts" booklet, and he listened carefully. He said he had never received Jesus as his Savior but he would like to one day; he wasn't ready yet. I told him that when he was ready he just needed to pray and ask the Lord to forgive him for his sins, and make him a child of God. When I first met this young man he was very skeptical about the Lord, but after being set free from a lot of anger and grief, he is certain that there is a God and a heaven. In a short while I think he will receive the Lord because "it's the kindness of God that leads to repentance" (Romans 2:3) and God has been showing him His kindness through emotional healing. 

Grief Diagnosed as Bipolar Disorder     66

Robert Whittaker, an award-winning journalist, was puzzled by learning from his research that Harvard Medical School researchers had found in 1994 that the outcomes for schizophrenia patients in the U.S. had worsened over the previous two decades and were no better now than 100 years earlier. He was also puzzled to learn from the World Health Organization that poor countries like India and Nigeria had far better schizophrenia outcomes than the United States, due to their lack of access to antipsychotic medications. This led to his extensive research, culminating in the publication of his book Mad in America in 2002. He then discovered that the number of people placed on the disability roles of our country for mental disorders had tripled in the last two decades, and his investigation into the cause of this phenomenon led to the publication of another book, Anatomy of an Epidemic. Both of these books are powerful and informative are recommended to the readers of this website. Whittaker has established an organization called "Mad in America" and he has a website at madinamerica.com in which he regularly feartures articles and information about research on psychiatric medications. On his website he recently featured an article entitled, "Backing Away from Psychiatry" written on September 1, 2016 by Ronda Richardson, who shares her personal story about her experience with psychiatry. The following is a brief excerpt, but I would encourage you to read the entire store and subscribe to his weekly newsletter to stay current on psychiatry issues. "I was first hospitalized at age sixteen after the death of my grandmother. She was a genius with a photographic memory and she understood me. When I sat with her I didn't feel like a freak or a misfit. I was just me, and she made space for all my quirks. Once she was gone, my safe space was gone and I never fully recovered. Looking back now I believe I was hospitalized for grief, but labeled with bipolar disorder." "My stay in hospital at age sixteen included being told that they had tested my IQ and I was smart, therefore making it all up. I was given ECT as a treatment for making it all up, and then was discharged with ten words laced heavily with contempt. These words still echo in my head: 'Get her out of here, she will never get well.' I was discharged without the meds I had been on in the hospital, and I went through withdrawal at home with no idea what withdrawal was. I now understand that the nightmare I went through was from the sudden discontinuation of medications such as Ativan and Prozac." "Twenty years later, I finally realized that death was better than here, but I didn't want to die. ‘Here’ was medication-induced Lupus. ‘Here’ was a medication-induced tic. ‘Here’ was my life unraveling despite following all the orders and taking all the medications. I still had regular hospital stays, and when I did I would be blamed outright. 'We all know this is what you do. You mess with your meds!' my therapist told me after my last hospital stay. In her mind the answer was clear and simple, but she was building a puzzle without having all the pieces. The doctor told me that the rash I had all over my body was from anxiety or the sun, not the new medication. The fact that I was concerned about it was a sign of my obsessions." "I couldn't win. They were fighting dirty. A Bipolar 1 diagnosis made me an easy target to blame. I couldn't convince them that I was compliant even by being compliant, and this compliance almost killed me. I couldn't prove that I had insight because they had already made their minds up. I was in a very dangerous position." This woman never received the help she was seeking, from the mental health system, but If she had simply been shown by someone when she was 16 years old how to overcome her grief over the loss of her grandmother, this tragedy would never have happened. It's sad that there are so many lives that have been damaged like this by psychiatric treatment when the Lord has provided us a simple way to be set free from grief. I pray that many Christians will learn this ministry and that churches will teach it regularly to their congregations, in order to change the country and the world and demonstrate the power of God through prayer-based emotional healing. Please continue to spread the good news with me of God's compassion and power to heal the brokenhearted and to set the emotional captives free.